


Never Forget (How Much I Love You)

by BlackWidowNat



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Don't worry there will be a happy ending, Gen, High School, Modern AU, No Dark Curse, Parents Prince "Charming" James | David Nolan & Snow White | Mary Margaret Blanchard, Past Baelfire | Neal Cassidy/Emma Swan, Past Wizard of Oz|Walsh/Emma Swan, more tags to be added as I write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2018-01-27
Packaged: 2018-06-05 14:50:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 35,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6709330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackWidowNat/pseuds/BlackWidowNat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When his older brother returns home to Storybrooke after years spent in the Navy, Killian Jones returns to help him adjust...only to be confronted with someone he hadn't seen for five years and never expected to see again and a big secret is brought to light.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Then and Now, Now and Then

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my newest story! I will say no more and just let you get to it.  
> ~~~~~~  
> Also, I'm continuing with using Polyvore to create outfit collections for every chapter. I hope you guys enjoy this added touch.

**[Outfit Collection](http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/collection?id=5346097) **

* * *

 

**May 2016**

Storybrooke, Maine was not a place Killian Jones ever planned to return to.  He’d left it when he was 18 years old, right after graduating high school, to go to the Maritime Academy at California State University and better his life… _their_ lives.  Everything Killian ever did was for her, the girl he’d loved since his family moved to Storybrooke from Ireland when he was six.

Now, as he drove past the town line-- ( _WELCOME TO STORYBROOKE_ ) --, all he could think of was her: Emma Nolan, the love of his life…and the last time he saw her…

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

**April 2011**

_Killian ignored the cold and ran as fast and as hard as his legs could carry him.  He hadn’t been this excited in a long time.  He ran down the sidewalk to Emma’s, clutching his acceptance letter to CSUMA.  As he rounded the corner to Emma’s street, he slowed down and reached into his left pocket where the little black jewelry box sat.  He and Emma were both 18 so he planned to ask her to marry him so that they could go to California together.  Properly._

_The light on the porch of the Nolan’s house turned on as he walked up the steps and Emma stepped outside._

_“Killian!”  She started, a hand over heart.  “What are you doing here?”_

_“I needed to see you Emmalove.  I’ve got wonderful news!”_

_“Oh.  You do?” She asked somewhat anxiously._

_“Aye”, he replied, furrowing his brows.  “Are you alright my darling?”_

_“Yeah, I’m fine.”_

_“Emma, you may be able to spot a liar but you are quite horrible at being one.”_

_“Just…just tell me your news.”  Killian took her hand and led her to the porch swing Emma’s father, David, had installed when they were 10._

_“See for yourself!”  Killian handed over the acceptance letter he’d received that day and watched as her eyes swept over it.  Her eyes widened and she looked over at him with a sad smile and the beginning of tears in her eyes.  “Emma?”_

_“Killian, I’m so happy for you!  It’s what you wanted, all you talked about, getting into CSUMA and study Marine Engineering.  You’re going to love California.”_

_“No Emma,_ we’re _going to love California.”  Killian slipped the box out of his jacket pocket got down on one knee._

_“Killian, what are you doing?”_

_“I have loved you since we were six years old and I will love you until my last breath.  I realize we’re young, but I love you and I don’t want to begin the next step in my life without you by my side.  Emma Ruth Nolan, the moon and stars of my life, will you marry me?”_

_By the time he finished speaking, tears were running down Emma’s cheeks as she covered her mouth with a gloved hand and Killian opened the small box to reveal a simple but gorgeous ring: a small Peridot, set in a silver swirl band._

_“Oh my God.”_

_“So, what do you say Emma?  I know you love as much I love you.  Please, say something.”  Emma reached for the small box and shut it.  “Emma?”_

_“I can’t Killian.  We’re just kids, we can’t get married!  You’re about to start your dream career and I--”  Emma stood and Killian along with her.  “I can’t do this anymore.  Please go Killian.”  She stepped towards the front door, but Killian grabbed her elbow._

_“Emma, you can’t do this.  I love you and I know you love me.  Please talk to me…I know there’s more to this.  Talk to me and we can fix whatever is wrong.  Please love, don’t do this.”_

_“Just go.”  Emma quickly pulled open the front door and stepped inside.  She turned to look at him one last time, tears flowing.  “Goodbye Killian.”_

_Killian stood on the porch and called for Emma until David, with a sad look on his face, came out and told him that she refused to speak to him.  He refused to leave so David called Liam and Killian’s brother drove over and had to physically place him in his truck._

_The next day, Killian raced to school, hoping to speak to her, but Emma didn’t show.  He found her other best friend, Elsa Vinter, and interrogated her about Emma’s whereabouts.  Elsa informed him that all she knew was that Emma had withdrawn from school that morning, with intentions to finish school via a GED._

_After school, he went to her house and was once again denied a chance to speak with Emma.  Emma’s mother, Mary Margaret, was the one to come outside this and let him down easy._

_“She doesn’t want to talk to you Killian.  You need to go and listen to her wishes.  Please, you’re just making it harder on her.”_

_“What about how hard it is on_ me _?  You know how much I love her Mrs. Nolan and I know that you know she loves me.  If anything, I just need to know_ why.  _Please.”_

_“Killian, honey, please…”_

_“Fine.”_

_Killian stomped away.  Every day for a week, he went back to the Nolan’s house.  When not even Emma’s parents came outside, he started to leave letters.  Day after day for a month, Killian slipped a letter into the front mail slot on the front door.  He never received any indication that Emma read them, and one day a stack of them appeared in his and Liam’s mailbox._

_Near the end of May, CSUMA sent him a letter saying he’d been approved for early registration, which would require him to leave for Vallejo in June.  With his brother leaving for the Navy and his heart broken beyond repair, Killian packed up all his things and left Storybrooke, Maine…with no intention to ever return._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

As Killian’s rental car navigated down Main Street, he passed the infamous Granny’s Diner/Bed & Breakfast where he had shared so many moments with his Emma.  It had been five years since he’d last seen her, since she’d broken his heart and he’d run away from his pain. 

Liam had been honorably discharged from the Navy and was returning home, to the town they’d grown up in and Killian took leave from his job in Seattle to help his brother settle back into life as a civilian.  Knowing Emma was still in Storybrooke and that he had a high chance of seeing her while he was making him nervous.  He’d tried his damnedest to move on, to forget the girl who had no longer wanted him.

Emma had been his best friend since they were kids, and her parents had been there for him and Liam when their parents died in a car accident when Liam was 17 and Killian was 10.  In high school, he’d been there for her when her first boyfriend Neal had dumped her, claiming she was boring and a prude because she’d refused to sleep with him.  Even though he was secretly happy she’d finally left that git, he lent her his shoulder to cry on.

He’d been working up the courage to finally ask her to dinner, when she came to him one day of their junior year in Storybrooke High’s cafeteria with a smile and the news that Walsh Simms had asked her out.  He put on a happy face and congratulated her on her luck…but it didn’t last.  Walsh was worse than Neal, who had put up with his and Emma’s friendship.  Walsh started to keep her away from Killian, saying that it wasn’t right for ‘his girl’ to be hanging out with a guy who wasn’t him.  He wouldn’t see her for days at a time (school not counting), reduced to speaking to her through texts.

Then one day, Walsh cornered him at school and shoved him against the lockers.  He threatened Killian if he should discover any other kind of communication from him to Emma in any way.  Killian did what he could to voice his concerns to David, who was Sheriff of Storybrooke.  But David and Mary Margaret didn’t believe him, claiming that Walsh was an ‘angel’ and a perfect gentleman.  It wasn’t until Emma accepted a hug from Killian on her birthday that it all came to a head.  Walsh had thrown a punch at Killian, but Emma had pushed him out of the way and taken the hit.  When Emma’s parents saw the shiner on her left cheek, they couldn’t deny the problem any longer.  Walsh was expelled and left town with his Aunt Zelena soon after.  David and Liam had to hold Killian back from tracking that ‘monkey-boy’ down and beating him within an inch of his life for what he’d done to Emma.  It was only her quiet plea that stopped him.  Proving, once again, that he would do anything she asked.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Killian pulled into the driveway of his and Liam’s childhood home, shaking his head to get rid of the last dregs of his memories.  He stepped out and grabbed his suitcases from the trunk and went up to the front door to ring the bell.  A few moments later, Liam pulled the door open with a big smile on his face.

“Little brother!  You’ve finally made it.  I feared that you had forgotten where the place was”, he said.  Killian pushed past his brother and deposited his bags at the foot of the stairs.

“First of all, it’s _younger_ brother.  Secondly, you know I could _never_ forget this house…it holds too much for me.”  Liam stood quietly and then suddenly pulled Killian in for an embrace.

“I know it does Killian.  That’s why I want to thank you for coming here to help me, I can’t pretend to know how hard it must be for you.”  Killian pulled away, self-deprecating smile on his face.

“It’s no matter.  This isn’t about me, it’s about you.  I promise I will do my utmost to help you adjust however I can.”

“Thank you brother.  Now come, let’s get you settled in to your old room, shall we?”  Liam picked up one of his bags and went upstairs.  Killian’s bedroom was the second on the right, straight at the end of the hall.

“Can I ask you one thing brother?” Killian asked as they dropped his bags on his old bed.  Liam leaned against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest.

“Yes, I’ve seen her, and she’s doing fine.  I even spoke to her, told her you were finally coming home.  She asked about you, seemed worried that you wouldn’t want to see her.”  Killian let out a frustrated sigh.

“Of all the bloody stupid things she could think.”

“What do you expect?  You haven’t been back for five years, at all.  At least I had an excuse.”

“ _Don’t_ , Liam.”  Killian ran a hand through his think black hair and sighed again.  “Just...How is she?”

“I told you she’s fine Killian.”  Something on his face sparked Killian’s interest.

“Liam, I may not have her ability to spot a liar far into next week, but I do know when you’re lying to me.”

“It’s not my place Killian.  You’ll have to speak with her.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Sleep didn’t come easily to Killian.  He tossed and turned for hours before he got up and dressed in black sweats, hoodie, and Nike running shoes.  As he prepared to leave his bedroom, his eyes fell across a white binder that was still shelved where they’d left it long ago.  In the clear pocket of the spine it said: _Emma and Killian, Wedding Plans & Album.  _Killian looked away and went downstairs, quietly stepping out the front door for a late night run.  The memory of that day came to him as his feet hit the pavement…

 

**_December 2010_ **

_Killian’s phone vibrated on the kitchen table.  He swallowed his last bite of cereal and checked the text.  Rinsing his bowl in the kitchen sink, he smiled when he saw the message was from Emma._

**Swan Princess:** Hurry up loser, it’s freezing and the Bug doesn’t like being idle.

 

_Killian laughed to himself as he typed out his response and pulled on his favorite black peacoat._

**The Captain:** Keep your shirt on princess…I’m hurrying.

 **Swan Princess:** Hurry your ass up faster or I’m leaving for school without you Jones.

 

_Killian put on his black beanie and his gloves and pulled on his backpack.  He locked his front door and jogged carefully down the steps to Emma’s awaiting vehicle.  Killian opened the passenger door and tossed his backpack in the backseat and then deposited himself into the passenger seat._

_“Good morning love.”_

_“Morning.”_

_“How are you this abominably cold day?”_

_“I’m practically a snow man.  I’m going to have to get a space heater in this thing”, she replied, gesturing around the Bug.  They talked about homework and the impending holiday as Emma drove up Main Street towards Granny’s.  Killian hopped out of the car and went into the Diner and returned a few minutes later with two to-go coffee cups in his gloved hands._

_“Hot chocolate with whipped cream and cinnamon for the princess and same for me.”_

_“Thanks.  Ooh…it’s smells delicious!”  Emma took a sip and put the cup in the holder and pulled away from the Diner and off to school.  Once there, they met up with Elsa in the parking lot, and while the two of them were in thick jackets, beanies, and gloves, Elsa donned a simple light blue jacket to go with her jeans and boots._

_“How are you not freezing?!” exclaimed Emma and Killian nodded in agreement as they walked up the school’s front walk.  Elsa simply shrugged._

_“Cold never really bothers me.”_

_The group hung up their things in their lockers and made their way to their first period Home Economics class that was taught (on a volunteer basis) by the local convent’s Mother Superior.  Once everyone was seated, Mother Superior called everyone to attention._

_“Listen up!  Today begins the partner selection for our next unit: Marriage & Family.  You will get assigned someone today, but we won’t really get into the meat of the project until the New Year.”  Most of the class groaned, knowing that taking care of a sugar sack baby would be coming up soon.  “When I call you and your partner’s names, please take a seat next to them.”  Everyone packed away anything they’d removed from their backpacks, to get ready for the move._

_“I hope I get paired with that new guy, Jack”, said Elsa as she leaned over to Emma’s desk.  “And I’m pretty sure I know who you want to be with!”_

_“Shh! Shut up Elsa”, replied Emma.  Mother Superior gave her a Look and then went back to her class-list._

_“Ariel Waters and Eric Prince.  Jefferson Stan and Ruby Lucas.  Ashley Boyd and Sean Herman. Will Scarlet and Belle French.  Victor Whale and Lily Page.  Aurora Stefan and Phillip Morris.  Rose Bell and Graham Hunter.  Elsa Vinter and Jack Overland.  Emma Swan and Killian Jones.”_

_Emma, who already shared a lab table seat next to Killian, simply scooted closer to him and he smiled over at her._

_“Ready to start planning our wedding love?”  Emma’s cheeks turned as red as her favorite winter coat._

_“Remember that we’re probably going to have budget Killian.  You won’t be able to go too crazy.”_

_“Crazy is my middle name”, he replied with a wink._

_“No it’s not, it’s Brady.”_

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Killian hadn’t realized where his feet were taking him until he smelled the salty brine of the wind coming off the Atlantic.  The ocean always had a calming **effect** on him.  After his parents died, he would spend hours sitting on the bench that he now occupied once again.

Killian wondered what big secret Liam was protecting for her.  The way Liam looked, it seemed like it was something he happened upon, and not something she told him.  What could Emma have been hiding for the last five years?  Could it have something to do with why she refused him all those years ago?

So deep in thought, Killian didn’t hear the approaching footsteps until the person was practically next to him.  When his late night visitor finally spoke, he felt his heart constrict in his chest.

“Hello Killian.”  He took a deep breath and turned around to face her.

“ _Emma_.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma wants to talk to Killian, but he's just a smidge angry right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I didn't do Polyvore sets for this chapter. Somehow it didn't feel necessary, but I will have one for the next chapter. Enjoy!

“ _Emma_.” 

She hadn’t realized how much she missed the way he said her name. It usually sounded like a prayer, and everyone could hear the love he had for her in his voice, but this time it was laced with sadness and surprise.

“Killian. It’s nice to see you.” He let out a snort of disbelief and turned to lean with his back to the railing of the dock.

“Are you bloody kidding?” Killian crossed his arms over his chest. “Not a single word in five years and all you can say is ‘It’s nice to see you’?”

“I know you’re mad. But it really _is_ nice to see you.”

“Why are you here?”

“Liam said you were getting in to town today…”

“Oh! So you speak to my brother regularly do you?”

“Killian, please…” she said as she took a step closer to him. He moved away from her and ran a hand over his scruff.

“ _Don’t_.”

“I’m sorry. As soon as you left town, I realized the mistake I made…and then it was too late. I figured you were so angry at me that you wouldn’t want to speak to me, to listen to the reason--” Killian cut her off.

“Stop. Have you any idea what I would’ve given to hear this from you _five years ago_? I loved you with every part of me, Emma Swan, and you threw it all away.” Emma watched as he pushed away from the railing and lifted the hood of his sweater over his head and tried to walk past her. Her hand shot out and grabbed his arm to stop him.

“We should talk.” Emma felt the hope drain from her when he shook her hand from his arm.

“You had five years to do that!” he shouts. The look on his face said he hadn’t meant to have an outburst, she saw the anger at himself for yelling in his eyes. “Look, I can’t do this with you right now. I didn’t think it’d be this hard, seeing you again.”

Emma watched as he took off, jogging up the docks and then down the street to where she knew his house was. She walked back to her car, her trusty yellow Bug, and slid into the driver’s seat. Her heart hurt, like it was physically breaking and the tears began to fall when she realized that this was how Killian must have felt all those years ago. If this is how he reacted just seeing her, how was she going to tell him?

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**August 2010**

_After the whole incident with Walsh in May, Emma was excited to start her senior year without that dark cloud over her. Walsh and his Aunt Zelena had moved to Boston a few weeks after Walsh had been expelled for ‘the incident’, as Emma liked to call it._

_With everything she went through while she was with Walsh, Emma had become subdued and not as outgoing as she used to be. After much discussion with Mary Margaret and David, Emma agreed to spend a couple hours a week speaking with Dr. Hopper. At first, it was difficult to talk about it, but the more time she spent with the doctor (who sometimes kind of reminded her of Jiminy Cricket from_ Pinocchio), _the easier it became._

_Emma spent most of her time with Killian as well. He worked with his brother at Storybrooke Marina, mainting and cleaning boats, and she took a summer job working at Storybrooke Fish & Chips, which was on the pier right next to him. Somehow, this allowed them to get closer with one another and Emma came to realize something that she didn’t ever think was possible: she like-liked Killian Jones._

~*~*~*~*~*~

**May 2016**

Emma stood behind the counter of _Sweet Dreams Are Made of Teas_ , the shop she’d opened with Elsa a year after high school with an investment from her parents and Elsa’s Aunt Ingrid, staring out the window and thinking of the events of the previous night when Liam Jones walked in. He saw her and made a beeline for the front counter.

“Morning Liam, what can I get for you?” she asked with a smile. It quickly faded when she saw the grim expression on the man’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“What happened?” he asked and she shrugged. “Did you see him at some point?”

“Last night.” Emma looked down at the counter. “Somehow I knew he’d be at the docks, so I hung around, waiting for a while and he showed.”

“You need to talk to him.” Emma slammed her hand down on the counter, startling the few customers that were there.

“I know! Don’t you think I know that, Liam? I tried. He was just so angry.”

“What do you expect?”

“Can you not right now?”

“You talk to him”, Liam said as he looked her straight in the eye, “Or _I_ will.”

“Don’t you _dare_ speak like that to _me,_ Liam Brennan Jones.”

“I--” They were interrupted by Elsa clearing her throat.

“Maybe you two should speak in private?” she said. Emma gave her a look, “Go, it’s slow right now.”

Liam and Emma stepped outside, into the alley next to the shop. She took a defensive stance, arms crossed over her chest and chin up in defiance, as Liam just paced, hands on his hips.

“Emma, look. He needs to know, it’s his right. If it comes from someone else, he will be angrier than you could possibly imagine and he will never speak to you again. Trust me on this, I know my brother. If you ever loved him as much as he loved you, and I’m pretty sure he _still_ loves you, you will tell him.”

“I have _never_ stopped loving him. _Never_.”

“Then why did you do that to him?”

“I was scared. I didn’t want to bring him down, stop him from living his dream. Because he wouldn’t have left Storybrooke, you know that.” Liam smiled and nodded.

“Aye, if I know anything about my little brother--”

“Younger.”

“Right. You have a point. Just tell him what you’ve told me Emma, he’ll understand.”

“He doesn’t want to talk to me Liam.”

“We’ll have to give him a little time then. I’ll work on him as best I can in the meantime.”

“Thank you Liam.” Emma stood on her tiptoes to hug him, and then said her goodbyes, heading back into the shop.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

That night, Emma sat on the balcony of her parent’s loft with her father, watching the stars. She knew David wanted to say something but respected her enough to stop himself until Emma chose to divulge.

“You can ask Dad.” Emma looked over at her father, who let out a breath of relief.

“Your mother and I were just worried what has you in such a…” David waved his hand around, trying to find the right word.

“Mood?” Emma supplied.

“I guess.”

“I know you know he’s back.” David looked down at his feet and nodded.

“Yeah.”

“I talked to him. At least I _tried_ to talk to him. He was so angry.”

“Princess…I’m so sorry.” David stood and pulled Emma into a tight hug. “Did you get a chance to tell him?”

“No. Like I said, he was angry and didn’t really let me get a word in.” Emma and David broke apart and took their seats once more. “I wish we’d never gone down to the beach that day. If we hadn’t, Liam wouldn’t have seen and wouldn’t have called Killian.”

“But you said--” Emma cut him off.

“Liam wouldn’t do that, he wouldn’t tell him outright. But I’m sure he made up some excuse to get Killian to come back here. Liam and I talked today. He said he’s going to talk to Killian, see if he’ll agree to talk to me.”

“Are you prepared for what that’s going to bring? The possibility that he’ll want no part or that he’ll want to be around but not be with you?” Emma wrung her hands together and bit her lip.

“Nothing is going to prepare me for that. Although, I’m pretty sure he’ll never want anything to do with me ever again after I tell him.” All of a sudden, the weight of the situation felt heavier than it ever had over the past five years. David pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight as her tears fell. “Oh God. Daddy, what am I going to do?”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**December 2010**

_Four months. It had been four months since she’d realized her feelings for Killian and Emma_ still _had no idea what to do. A few days after being put together as partners for the Home-Ec project, she started to panic. It became difficult to be around him, to talk about planning a fake wedding and preparing for hypothetical children, so she begged off their ‘friend-dates’ and avoided him as much as she could for a couple weeks. Emma kept their communication to texts._

_When she finally felt she had herself under control and that her love for him wouldn’t show as plain as day on her face, she invited him to lunch to apologize._

_“Swan, you don’t have to apologize. You forget that I can read you like an open book.   I know something was bothering you, and what kind of best friend for life would I be if I pried when I know you’d hate it and defied your wishes?” he asked as he took her hand over the table._

_“Swan? Where did_ that _come from?”_

_“I was doing that report for Biology on waterfowl and I learned a few things. Did you know that swans sometimes maintain mates and relationships for life?”_

_“Oh, do they now?”_

_“Yup”, he replied, popping the ‘p’. He smiled and looked down at their hands, his brows furrowing. Now it was Emma’s turn to read him._

_“Killian, is everything okay? Is there something_ you _want to talk about?”_

 _“I love you Swan.” Emma smiled at her new nickname and her heart fluttered because he couldn’t possibly mean it_ that _way._

_“I love you too. You know that.” Killian stood from the metal chair outside Granny’s and paced, wringing his hands together. “Killian?”_

_“You’re not understanding.” He paced some more and then walked over to her and pulled Emma up from her chair. Looking deep into her eyes, Emma realized what he was about to do a millisecond before he did. Pulling her to him with his hands on her waist, Killian kissed her._

_It was just like the stories said; fireworks exploded behind her closed eyes and she felt a tingle of happiness all the way down to the tips of her fingers. She wrapped her arms around his neck, playing with the hair at the nape, as she sighed into the kiss._

_They finally broke apart when air became necessary and Leroy, the town handyman and friend of Emma’s mother, yelled at them ‘About time!’ from across the street._

_“Do you understand now?” Killian asked her as he leaned his forehead against hers. Emma laughed lightly, feeling happier than she ever had._

_“You know, I’m not really sure. You should probably tell me again.” Killian smiled big before covering her lips with his once more._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**January 2011**

_Being with Killian was one the greatest things to ever happen to Emma, after everything she had gone through with Neal and Walsh. He called her his Swan and they even said ‘I love you’ pretty quick. Killian admitted that he had loved Emma since the day they had met in first grade and that’s why it was so easy for him to say the words. He went on to say that she didn’t need to say it until she was ready, she had brushed it off with a laugh, telling him that she had probably loved him since the day they met too._

_Killian’s birthday was on the 26 th and Emma had no idea what to get him. She wandered into Mr. Gold’s Pawn Shop, against her better judgement, when she saw an old compass in the window because she knew Killian would love it. Emma almost walked right back out when she saw Neal at the counter (the shop belonged to his father after all)._

_“What are you doing here?” he asked with a sneer._

_“I’m shopping. You got a problem with that?”_

_“Whatever.”_

_“Just give me the compass in the window.” Emma pulled her cash from her pocket. Neal walked around the counter to the window and pulled the compass from its place and put it on the glass counter for her._

_“It’s $50. You can save your money if you just do me a little favor you know.” Neal leaned forward and leered at her. Emma tossed the money on the counter and took the compass, placing it in her pocket._

_“You’re a disgusting pig Neal.”_

_“I don’t know why you’re with_ him _when you could be with me. He’s going to get tired of you being a prude. He’s going to leave you and forget all about you. Then you’re going to be all alone again.”_

 _“You’re a dick Neal. Why don’t you go back to doing Tamara…like all the other guys do?” Emma turned on her heel to leave. Just before she stepped out, she turned back to Neal, “By the way asshole, I’m_ not _a_ _prude…you just never did it for me.”_

_Emma was proud of herself for not letting the encounter with Neal get to her, so she put it out of her mind. For Killian’s birthday (which landed on a Saturday), Emma packed a picnic basket with food for the day and picked up her boyfriend around mid-morning. After he kissed her hello, she pulled a blindfold form the glove compartment._

_“Put this on.” Emma handed him the blindfold. “We’re not moving until you do.”_

_“Whyyy?” he whined._

_“Come on birthday boy, stop whining. It’s a surprise, okay? Just do it.”_

_“Anything for you my love.” Killian folded up the cloth and covered his eyes, tying it into a knot behind his head. When Emma was sure it was secure, she took off._

_“So, how does it feel to be 18? You’re an adult now you know.” Killian chuckled from over in the passenger seat._

_“I feel the same as always to be honest love. All I can do is join the military and vote, really.” After a short drive, they arrived at Storybrooke Marina._

_“We’re here! Just wait in the car and let me help you out, okay?”_

_“Of course Swan. I already know where we are though.”_

_“Oh you do, do you?” She got out and ran around to the passenger side, and opened the door. “And how, pray tell, did you figure it out?”_

_“I’ve worked at the Marina most of my summers since freshman year and I spend plenty of time here.”_

_“Uh huh…”_

_“Also, I can smell the salt from the ocean.”_

_“Oh…right.” Emma pulled him from the car. “Stand here a second.”_

_“Of course Princess.” Emma rolled her eyes as she popped the trunk and took out the picnic basket with their food, in which she’d hidden the gift she’d gotten him. Emma took Killian’s hand with her left and carried the basket in her right._

_“We’re almost there.”_

_“I’m glad darling. I’m excited to this surprise birthday sail started.” Emma stopped abruptly and smacked Killian in the shoulder. He cried out and lifted the blindfold off one eye to look at her. “What in the blazes was that for?”_

_“You ruined my surprise Jones! Who told you? Was it Leroy? Oh, I know! I bet it was Liam! He better sleep with one eye open because I plan on shaving those brown curls of his head.”_

_“Love?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“No one told me. I just figured it out.” Emma gave him a playful glare. “I’m sorry I ruined it love.”_

_“It’s not everything I had planned, so I_ guess _I could forgive you.” Killian pulled the blindfold all the way off and swaggered over to Emma, and she started to feel herself blush when she noticed how dark his normally bright blue eyes had become._

_“Oh really Swan?” She felt a shiver go down her spine as Killian placed his hands on her hips and pulled her to him. She wound her hands around his neck, once again playing with the hair at the nape; something he enjoyed so much, Emma would swear he would practically purr like a cat when she did it._

_“Yup.” He leaned forward and kissed her lightly, sly grin on his face._

_“Well then, what else do you have in mind?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Drop a comment! I will try to have the next chapter up by next week, but I'm not sure if I'll be alive after the finale this Sunday (5/15)
> 
> Once again, thanks to my beta bestie Courtney, without whom I will never feel comfortable posting anything ever again until it's looked at.
> 
> The bit I'm sure you are all waiting for will most likely be next chapter...because let's not kid anyone, I'm sure you all realize what's up by now.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, no Polyvore for this one. There should be one next chapter. I've already started work on chapter 4, so no fear, it should be out soon. Also, I know this one's short, but 4 is going to be chock full of feels and everything because things will start coming to light. It's going to get good.

**May 2016**

It had been a week since he’d seen Emma, but he couldn’t stop thinking of her. Liam had been on him about giving her a chance, to talk it out. Ending it the way she had…it hurt and he wasn’t ready. He didn’t really go into town all that much and he was thankful they’re house was close enough to the marina where Liam had docked their sailboat. He spent time on the water, trying to clear his head and think just what could’ve happened to have Emma do what she did.

One day, he was coming in from a day on the water to find his brother pacing in the kitchen while on the phone.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure he gets there. Everything will be fine okay? Good. You tell him Liam says hello by the way. Okay. I’ll see you later Emma.” Liam slipped him phone into his back pocket.

“Emma?” asked Killian. “Why were you talking to her?”

“This has gone on long enough. You _will_ talk to her and you _will_ listen. For the sake of…” Liam sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Just do this for me, aye, younger brother?”

Killian rolled his eyes and sighed.

“I will. Where am I to meet her?”

“She said meet her at Granny’s at 10am.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

_The Next Morning…_

 

Killian pulled his black hoodie over his head and slipped on his shoes. He called up the stairs to let Liam know he was leaving.

“Brother! I’m headed to Granny’s!”

“Oi! Some of us are still sleeping you git!”

“I’ll see you later!”

“Be nice!” Killian laughed to himself and stepped out the door. He took the opportunity of going to see Emma to get his morning run in.

By the time he reached Granny’s, his watch told him it was a quarter past and part of him was a little worried that Emma had thought he didn’t want to speak and had left. Killian was surprised when he looked up and saw her sitting in a booth by the window. He took a deep breath and mentally shook himself to get ready for the conversation he was about to have.

Killian jogged up the wooden steps of Granny’s and memories hit him as he listened to the bell over the door jingle. The crowd inside was busy enough that he wasn’t really noticed by anyone other than Emma, who looked up from her hot chocolate with a small smile and Granny herself.

“Killian Jones! It’s great to see you after all these years!” she said as she stepped out from behind the counter with open arms. He obliged her request for a hug. When he stepped back, she looked him over. “Looking good Jones. So, how is that brother of yours doing?”

“Fine Granny. Adjusting as best he can. Liam spent so much time in the strict naval life that he has to realize his life doesn’t have to be as strict anymore. His first ‘freedom’, as he calls it, is sleeping as late as he chooses.”

“I’m glad he’s doing well. Please tell me why it’s taken you so long to come and see me?” Killian reached up to scratch behind his ear.

“Ah, well…” He turned to look at Emma, then back to Granny. “I’m here to speak with Miss Nolan, it’s time we talked.”

“Oh! Is she _finally_ going to tell you--”

“Thanks Granny! I’ll take it from here.” Emma interrupted before the old lady could say anymore. “Come on Killian.”

He followed her over to her booth and slid in across from her. They were quiet until Emma pushed a paper cup towards him.

“Thank you Emma.” He took a sip and outwardly cringed when he tasted how cold it was.

“It would’ve been warm if you’d been on time.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” She went quiet again, biting her lip and staring out the window.

“We should probably just get our talk over with. Maybe then we can meet like civilized people for the duration of my time here.”

“Right. Yeah.” Emma took a sip of her drink and took a deep breath. “I need you to promise to let me finish saying my piece before you say anything, no matter what.”

“I’ll do my best.”

Emma took another deep breath and readied herself.

“Well, the reason I did what I did was because I was scared. Something happened and I didn’t think you’d like it or be okay with it. It’s only now that I realize how wrong I was. But still, I didn’t--” She was cut off by the shrill ring of her cellphone and she looked down at the number. “Sorry, I have to take this, it’s my mom.”

“Of course Sw--Emma.” He saw a hint of pink on her cheeks as she stepped away. She was still close enough that he could hear her side of the conversation.

“Hey Mom. I was in the middle of something, what’s wrong? What happened? Regina said Roland has Chicken Pox?! Tell him to stop scratching and I’ll get some Calamine lotion on the way. No, I’m heading home right now so I’ll get Elsa to watch the teahouse. Bye.” Emma rushed back over to the booth.

“Don’t worry, we can try this again. I’m sure Regina needs help with her boy.” Emma gave him a confused look.

“What? Oh, yeah. Give me your number and I’ll call you to reschedule.” Killian drained his cold drink and stood.

“My number never changed. I hope to hear from you soon.” He tossed the cup away before stepping outside and jogging back home.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Over the course of the week, Killian received several messages from Emma apologizing for not being able to see him. She explained that a few days after seeing him, the first symptoms of Chicken Pox started showing up on her and she’d been isolated so as to not get anyone else sick.

When her first text showed up, he was surprised to see she’d never changed her number either, the phone telling him he had a message from _Swan Princess_.

****

**_Swan Princess:_ ** _I’m so sorry I’ve had to cancel on you._

 **_Swan Princess:_ ** _I want you to know I’m not avoiding the problem. I just don’t want to get you sick. I know you haven’t had the pox._

****

He smiled at the fact that she’d remembered he hadn’t been stricken with Chicken Pox before, it meant she still must somewhat care for him. But because his heart still hurt after all this time, the more he stared at her nickname, the more his feelings pushed him to change it.

****

**_Killian:_ ** _It’s perfectly alright. I understand. When you’re well, we will sit down and talk._

 **_Emma:_ ** _Perfect. It’s a date then._

Killian ignored the feelings that rushed through him at her words. Deciding to just ignore her words, he didn’t text back. He went about his day, spending time with Liam, helping him decide what to do with his life now that he was out of the Navy.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

The second Emma hit ‘SEND’, she knew those were the absolute wrong words to say. ‘It’s a date’?! How could she have been so stupid?! It was one of the things she stewed over the next few days she was stuck in bed, away from everyone.

As her eyes swept over the pictures on the walls of her bedroom, and she thought of the memories captured there, Emma couldn’t help but wonder how much better they would’ve been with Killian in them. Her thoughts were interrupted by a small knock on her bedroom door.

“Come in.” The door creaked open and a little boy with a head filled with thick, black hair stepped inside. “Hey you. Make sure you don’t get to close.” The little boy giggled and climbed up on the corner of her bed that was farthest away from her.

“How are you feeling Momma?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment or Kudos if you haven't yet. Let me know what you think.


	4. The Meeting.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian and Liam find out the secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The translations for the Gaelic will be in the end notes, I didn't want to break up the flow of the story. I searched all over for a proper translation tool. I looked up Duolingo, but it's only for teaching so it didn't work. I ended up back with Google Translate, so please do forgive any mistakes. I hope I did the beautiful language justice. Enjoy!

**_Outfit Sets:_ **

**[Killian's Birthday Gift](http://www.polyvore.com/chapter_killians_birthday_gift/set?id=199105452) **

**[Killian, Emma, Brady](http://www.polyvore.com/chapter_meeting/set?id=199105228) **

 

* * *

 

**_January 2011_   
**

_Killian sat on the deck of the rented sloop as he looked over the compass Emma had given him for his birthday.  It was an exquisite piece: the compass itself sat in a worn wooden box with a small plate on the front that was semi-faded, HENRY EVERY and LONDON being the only visible words.  The compass appeared to made of brass or something, with a top that could be pulled up to be able to use it for navigation._

_He wasn’t sure Emma knew what she’d given him.  Henry Every (or Henry Avery) was a notorious pirate captain in the late 1690’s, who commanded around 11 ships.  He lived his life, sometimes branded as a maritime Robin Hood, when pirates like Calico Jack Rackham and Blackbeard were still children, no doubt influencing their later exploits._

_So enthralled with the gift, Killian didn’t hear Emma come up on deck until she spoke._

_“Hey sailor.”  He whipped around and a big grin emerged on his face at the sight:  Emma’s hair was messy from where his hands had been running through it all afternoon and he could just make out a mark below her left ear; he smiled bigger at the memory of their activities below deck, the first time for both.  “I was afraid the captain had had his way and decided to escape.”_

_“I’m sorry love.  I never meant to give you that impression.”  He scratched behind his ear as Emma sauntered over and wrapped her arms around him.  “Are you okay?”_

_“Of course I am.  It was perfect,_ you _were perfect.  It’s me who should be asking if_ you’re _okay.”_

_“I’m fine Swan.  I just came up here to think.”_

_“Oh? What about?”_

_“Just…so much has happened in my life.  I’ve lost so much.  Now I’ve got you and we’ve just…I guess I was thinking about how much I love you.  My heart could almost burst with it.  I know we’re young, but that is how I feel.”  He looked down at Emma to see tears forming in her eyes._

_“Relax.  These are happy tears.  I love you so much.”  She stood up on her tiptoes to kiss him.  When they broke apart, she leaned her forehead against his.  “Feeling better?”_

_“Much.”_

_“Good.”  She gave him a peck on the lips and leaned back with a smile, “Now, Killian Jones, will you take me back to bed?”_

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**June 2016**

Brady was the spitting image of his father, a constant reminder of what she’d given up all those years ago.  She had meant to tell him that morning two weeks ago, right before her mother had called to tell her about the Chicken Pox…and then she’d gotten sick.  It couldn’t have come at a worse time.

Now it was the first week of June and she thanked God that somehow Killian had avoided hearing about (and seeing) Brady.  Emma didn’t want him to find out like that.  It was only right that she be the one to tell him. 

She practically had to get Liam to swear on a Bible that he wouldn’t say anything before she did.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**_April 2016_ **

_Liam walked into Granny’s, shaking his coat of the light dusting of snowflakes that had been falling.  He slipped off his coat and hung it on the coat rack that Granny provided.  His usual booth was occupied, so he took a seat next to a little boy at the end of the counter._

_The boy, around four or five, was sipping his chocolate milk and swinging his legs back and forth.  Liam smiled at the simple joy the boy gained from a simple glass of milk.  He was starting to look away when the boy put down his glass and turned to look at him._

_“Hi mister.”  The little boy smiled up at Liam, grinning wide and donning a chocolate milk mustache._

_“Hi there”, he replied.  Something about the boy’s eyes struck him.  “Have we met before?  You look familiar.”_

_“My name is Brady, and I’m four years old!  I’m going to be five in October.”_

_“Well Brady, it’s delightful to meet you.  My name is Liam and I am much older than four.”_

_“You’re name is Liam?  My momma says I have an uncle named Liam!”_

_“Oh, you do?  Is he a nice bloke?”_

_“What’s a bloke?” Brady asked as he took another gulp of milk._

_“A man.”_

_“Oh.  I don’t know, I’ve never met him.  My momma says he’s a soldier!”  Liam wasn’t sure if Brady understood what that meant, but his tiny chest seemed to puff out with pride.  What are the odds that this little boy had an uncle who shared his name and was in the Armed Forces?_ That _is when it hit him._

 _Liam took a good long look at the little boy.  His hair, almost jet black and thick on his tiny head, drooped over his bright ocean blue eyes.  It struck him that he’d seen a little boy nearly identical to this one before, and_ his _name was Killian._

_“Brady, can you tell me who your mum is?”_

_“My momma’s name is Emma Nolan and I love her this much!”  Brady stretched his little arms as wide as he could._

_If Liam had been drinking anything, he was sure he would have done that comical ‘spit-it-out-in-surprise’ thing.  He was about to speak again when he heard a voice he hadn’t heard in years._

_“Liam?”_

~*~*~*~*~*~

_“How could you keep a secret like this?!”  Liam yelled as he paced in the common room of Granny’s B &B that was behind the Diner.  Brady had stayed at the counter, having the rest of his breakfast and chatting with Ruby, Granny’s granddaughter._

_“Could you keep it down please?  You remember the gossip vine in this town!”_

_“Are you—Emma, are you serious right now?”  Liam looked at her incredulously.  “You had my brother’s child and didn’t tell him.  You don’t get to tell me to calm down.”_

_“Liam,_ please _…”_

_“He’s coming to town.”_

_“What?”_

_“Killian arrives next month.  He’s coming to visit, to ‘help me adjust to a civilian life’ or something, he thinks I need help.”_

_“Oh God.”  Emma dropped her head into her hands._

_“Yeah and so you better start making plans to tell him.”  Liam crouched in front of her and placed his hands over hers._

_“He’ll hate me.  He’s never going to want to speak to me again!”_

_“Maybe…but at least he’ll know the truth.  He deserves at least that much from you.”_

_“I know.  You can’t tell him.  Please Liam, you have to promise not to tell him._ I _will.  I’ll figure out a way to do it somehow.”_

_“Don’t worry.  I swear I won’t say anything until you do.”  He hugged her tight and leaned back.  “Now, tell me about how he knows me.  You told him about me?  Did you tell him about Killian?”_

_“I never lied about his father.  I explained it the best I could, saying that he was away and that I didn’t know when he was coming back.”_

_They were interrupted by the sound of a pair of small feet coming towards them.  Liam stood to see his newly discovered nephew running to him._

_“Hi Mr. Liam!”_

_“Hi there Brady.”  Emma pulled her son into her lap and looked at him._

_“Hey Peanut, I have a bit of a surprise for you.”_

_“Really momma?  Is it a puppy?  Or a kitty?  Oh!  A turtle!”_

_“No baby, but maybe we’ll talk about a turtle later.  No, the surprise is him.”  Emma looked over at Liam._

_“Mr. Liam?”_

_“Yes.  Remember the story I told you about your uncle?”  Her little boy nodded.  “This is him.  This is your Uncle Liam, back from the Navy.”  The quick acceptance to something so important is something she loved about Brady; his little eyes grew wide and a big grin spread on his face._

_“Really?!”  He jumped off her lap ran into Liam’s arms as the older man crouched down once again.  “Uncle Liam!”_

_“It’s nice to meet you, lad.”  He placed a kiss in his nephew’s thick hair (so reminiscent of his brother’s as a child) and hugged him tight._

_“Uncle Liam?”_

_“Yes?”_

_“Do you know where my papa is?”_

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**June 2016**

Chicken pox was harder on adults than on kids and so Emma wasn’t 100% until the first week of June.  When she was sure she was ready to tell Killian, she sent him a text to tell him to meet her at _Sweet Teas_.

 

**_Emma:_ ** _Can you meet me at my shop?  Friday at 10?_

**_Killian:_ ** _Of course.  I’ll even be on time so my drink isn’t cold this time._

 

On Friday morning, Emma called her parents to remind them to be at the shop at a quarter ‘til to pick up Brady so Killian wouldn’t see him before she had a chance to speak to him.  With assurances from David that he’d be on time, Emma changed and got ready for work and then got Brady dressed and fed.

She and Brady lived in a loft above the tea shop.  It was easier to reach work and it was easier for her to drop him off at Storybrooke Daycare (which was only a block away) when she needed to.  Brady jogged down the stairs that led to the back of the shop and ran to the front.

“Auntie Elsa!”  Elsa turned from her post at the register and caught the little boy in her arms.  “Guess what!”

“Hey buddy.”  Elsa dropped him from the hug.  “Your favorite table is empty.  Go ahead and take a seat and I’ll bring over your hot chocolate.”

“Thank you Auntie Elsa!”  Brady hurried over to his table near the window, overlooking Main Street, and pulled his coloring book and Crayons out of his _Jake and the Neverland Pirates_ backpack, spread everything out and got to work.

Elsa looked back at Emma, who was smiling at her son.

“So, are you ready?” Elsa asked.  Emma shook her head, eyes still on Brady.

“Of course not.  I’m about to tell Killian know that I’ve been lying to him for almost five years.”  She finally turned away from Brady and headed behind the counter.  She grabbed her black apron from the hook on the wall and put it on, making sure not to mess up the braided crown she’d spent so long making with her hair that morning.

Emma put the impending discussion with Killian from her mind as the shop opened and they got to work.  After helping Elsa up front, Emma went to the back where she worked on making her the cinnamon rolls topped with bacon crumbles and maple syrup; they were a favorite of everyone who came to the shop.  The only problem with working in the back was that sometimes Emma forgot about the time.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Killian was nervous, but he’d never admit it out loud.  He had already changed his outfit a few times before finally settling on a red, long-sleeve knit shirt with his black slim jeans, red Converse, and black leather jacket.

When he made it downstairs, Liam was waiting for him.

“Good Morning brother.”

“Hi.”

“You must be nervous, if you’re going to use one syllable answers.”

“Shut your gob, I’m not bloody nervous.”  Liam laughed as he sipped from his coffee mug.  Killian went to the fridge and poured himself some orange juice and took the seat across from his brother.

“Of course you are.  You always get more Irish and start cursing more when you do.”

“ _B_ _heith ciúin tú leathcheann_ _agus aigne do ghnó féin_!”

“ _Agus claonadh a bhíonn tú a labhairt níos mó i máthar theanga chomh maith_ ”, replied Liam.  Killian drained his glass of juice and stared at the table.  “ _Tá sé ceart go leor chun tú a bheith neirbhíseach_ _Killian_ _._ ”  He sighed, then smiled; there was something comforting about reverting to Gaelic that reminded him of their mother…and he was pretty sure Liam knew that.

“ _Tá a fhios agat cad tá sí i bhfolach, ní gá duit?_ ”

“ _Sea, is féidir liom._ ”

“ _Inis dom cad é deartháir. Le do thoil._ ”

“ _Níl sé mo áit é sin a dhéanamh._ ”  Killian stood and went to the sink to rinse his glass.  When he was done, he turned back to Liam.

“ _Tá a fhios agam_ ”, said Killian as he zipped up his jacket.  “ _Tá mé ag fágáil, beidh mé ag caint leat níos déanaí_ _._ ”

“ _Ar mhaith leat dom dul in éineacht leat Killian?_ _”_

“ _Uimh_ _._ _Caithfidh mé é seo a dhéanamh ar mo chuid féin_.”

Killian gave his brother a nod and left.  Since he had given back the rental car, Liam had lent him his Jeep and he drove into town in silence.  When he parked in the lot next to _Sweet Teas_ , he checked the digital clock on the car’s dash; it read 9:30 am and smiled because he was early this time.

He got out of the car and walked around to the front of the shop.  As he walked up, he noticed a little boy at a table in the front window, coloring furiously, his little mop of black hair hanging over his forehead and almost touching the paper because he leaned so close.

When he walked in, the bell above the door chimed and the little boy greeted him without looking away from his work.

“Hi mister!”

“My, aren’t you a friendly little lad.”  As Killian walked over to the table, the boy looked up at him…and Killian stopped in his tracks.  The boy was almost an exact replica of him when he was young; he knew because he’d seen plenty of pictures.

“Are you okay mister?”

“Uh…um…”  Killian couldn’t form a proper sentence to answer.

“Killian?”  He looked over towards the voice that spoke just then to see Elsa Vinter stepping from behind the counter.

“Elsa?”  She nodded.

“Let me go get her.”  Killian was still stunned and he turned back to the little boy.

“Would you like to sit with me and color?”

“S-sure lad.”  The little boy giggled as Killian took his seat.

“Lad?  My uncle calls me that!”

“Uh, what…what is your uncle’s name?”

“Liam Jones!”  If Killian hadn’t already been sitting, he would’ve fallen to the ground.  There were a lot of Liam Jones’ in the world, but there was only _one_ in this town.  Suddenly, a thought struck him.

“Lad, how old are you?”

“I’m four, but I’ll be five in October.”

“Brady!”  The boy’s and Killian’s heads turned towards where Emma called over to them.  Killian stood and took a deep breath, looking between Brady and Emma.

“Swan, is…is this… _my son_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Be quiet you idiot and mind your own business!"  
> "And you tend to speak in mother's tongue more as well." "It is okay to be nervous Killian."  
> "You know what she's hiding, don't you?"  
> "Yes, I do."  
> "Tell me what it is brother. Please."  
> "It's not my place to do so."  
> "I know." "I'm leaving, I'll talk to you later."  
> "Would you like me to accompany you Killian?"  
> "No. I must do this on my own."


	5. Who's Your Daddy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian meets his son and we find out a little more about what happened when Emma broke up with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've tried something different with the translations this time around. Let me know what you think about it. Also, yay or nay on the use of Irish (or is it Gaelic or Irish Gaelic?...I just want to make sure I refer to the language properly). Once again, all translations are done with Google Translate.

**_May 2011_ **

_Her first thought when she saw the test’s results was: Neal was right.  Killian was going to leave her and forget about her and hate her.  But almost as quickly as the thought came, it left her because he wasn’t Neal and he wasn’t Walsh…he was_ Killian _.  He’d loved her since they were kids.  Sure, it would be a surprise and it would be a lot of work, what baby wasn’t?  They couldn’t live with her parents or with Liam, there just wasn’t any room for a baby but they would find something._

_Telling her parents was hard.  They weren’t mad, but they_ were _slightly disappointed.  Emma and Mary Margaret had to almost physically restrain David from running off to murder Killian._

_“Daddy please!” Emma cried._

_“Don’t worry princess, I’m not mad at you”, replied David as he shucked on his jacket.  “But that boy needs some talking to.  Now, Mary Margaret…where’s my gun?”_

_“David Nolan, you sit your butt down on that couch and I mean now!” yelled Mary Margaret.  “You too Emma.”  Father and daughter dropped to the couch with twin grimaces on their faces._

_“Sorry dear.”_

_“You should be, David”, his wife replied.  “You will_ not _be murdering Killian.  He is the father of our future grandchild.”  David made a move as if to protest but Mary Margaret shut him down quick with a Look that could’ve burnt him to a crisp where he sat.  “Now, Emma…have you told him anything?”_

_“No”, replied Emma with a shake of her head, “He just thinks I’ve been sick.  Even I didn’t realize it until I took the test yesterday.”_

_“Okay, before you tell him anything, we’ll take you to see the doctor.  I’ll call him right now.”_

_The doctor confirmed what the little plastic test already had: Emma was pregnant.  While anxious as to know what Killian would say, Emma was still very excited and happy to tell him.  But then he’d showed her the acceptance letter to CSUMA and proposed and it was all too much.  She couldn’t ruin this for him and the only way that she wouldn’t, would be to let him go.  He could never know about the baby._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**June 2016**

_“Swan, is…is this…my son?”_   Killian voiced his question quietly enough that Brady didn’t hear but Emma did.  Before she could answer, Brady hopped down from his chair and ran to his mother, wrapping his little arms around her leg.

Emma looked down at him, running her hand through his unruly hair, tears in her eyes.

“Yes Killian, this is your son.”  Brady’s little eyes snapped up to look at hers and he let go of her leg as she crouched down.  “Brady, this is your papa.”  The little one turned to look at his newly discovered father.

“Papa?”  Killian looked at him and there was no denying it, Brady was his son.  He nodded at the boy.

“Aye lad, I’m your papa.”  Killian smiled wide, tears in his eyes.

“Papa!”  Killian opened his arms wide as Brady ran at him and scooped him up into a big hug.  “I’m so happy to see you!  Momma said you went away, but she told me stories about you.”

“Oh really?  What kind of stories?”

While Killian sat down with Brady in his lap, Emma walked to the back and allowed Elsa to wrap her up in a tight hug as she cried.

“What have I done?” she cried into Elsa’s shoulder.  “Killian couldn’t even look at me.”

“You need to realize something Emma”, said her friend as she rubbed her hand along Emma’s back, attempting to sooth her.  “You broke up with him when he proposed and didn’t tell him why.  Now, five years later, he finds out that he has a son.  It was bound to be his initial reaction.”

“I know, but part of me hoped…”

“I know Emma, I know.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Killian watched Emma disappear into the back of the shop (which was wonderfully devoid of customers) over his son’s head.

_His son._

The fact that he had a son had yet to cement itself in his brain.  Brady wriggled in his lap and grasped Killian’s face with his little hands on each cheek.

“Papa?  Aren’t you listening?”

“I’m sorry my boy, what did you say?”

“I was telling you about my birthday last year.”

“Right, yes.  Go on.”

“Well…I wanted to have a party with _Jake and the Neverland Pirates_ decorations because he’s the bestest.”

“Oh really?”

“Duh, Papa.”  Brady proceeded to quirk his eyebrow just like him and then rolled his eyes in a manner so reminiscent of Emma that it wasn’t even funny.

“I was always fond of Captain Hook.”

“You can’t like him Papa!  He’s the _villain_!” gasped Brady, as if personally offended.

“I always thought he was a misunderstood fellow.”

Killian started explaining why he thought so, and Brady sat enraptured in his lap.  Neither of them noticed Emma and Elsa stepping out from the back to watch them.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Emma watched her son regale his father with the tale of his birthday party with tears in her eyes.  Killian was already so good with him and she hated herself for what she’d kept from both of them.  She was about to step forward when the bell above the shop’s front door chimed, announcing the arrival of her parents.

Killian, Brady, Emma, and Elsa all looked toward the door.

“Grammy!  Grandpa!”  Brady hopped off his father’s lap and ran to his grandparents, where David crouched to catch him and hoist him up on his hip.

“Killian?  It’s good to see you”, he said.

“Aye, it’s good to see you as well David.”  The men shook hands in an awkward greeting and David put Brady back on the ground.

“Grandpa!  This is my Papa!” Brady said as he pointed to Killian.  David and Mary Margaret’s eyes snapped to Emma’s, where she stood with Elsa in the back.

“How could you not tell me?” he asked them.  “How could you not get her to tell me I have a _son_?”

“Killian, I know saying sorry will never come close to conveying how we all feel, but this is not the place to discuss this”, said Mary Margaret.  “Come to dinner tonight and we will _all_ talk.”

“Fine.”

“Be there at seven.”

“Okay.  I’ll be going then.”  Before Killian could leave, Brady attached himself to his father’s leg.

“Don’t go Papa.  Please?”  He crouched down to his son’s level.

“Don’t worry my boy, because I’ll see you tonight okay?  There are a few things I need to take care of before tonight though, but I promise I will be there.”

“Okay Papa.”  Brady hugged Killian tight.  As Killian pulled away, Brady kissed his cheek.  “I love you Papa.”  Emma saw the surprised look on Killian’s face.

“I love you too son.  I’ll see you tonight.”  Killian kissed Brady’s head and left with a nod to everyone else.  Brady resumed his place at the small table, coloring, and Emma’s parents went over to her.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” asked Mary Margaret.

“Yeah, yeah.  I’m fine.”

“Are you sure princess?” asked David.

“Yes.  It’s just that so much has happened in such a little time…”

“Why are you crying Momma?” Brady asked from his table.  Emma took the seat across from him.

“I’m just happy you got to meet your daddy is all.”

“I’m happy too.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Killian didn’t go to home immediately.  He detoured to the small beach near the house and spent a few hours walking around trying to clear his head.  Liam texted to check-in, to see how he was so Killian went home to ask Liam why he didn’t say anything.

“Liam!  Where are you?!”

“I’m in the kitchen!” he called back.  Killian barged in to find Liam eating a sandwich at the table and he slammed his fists against it.

“ _Cén fhad a bhfuil ar eolas agat?_ _Cén fhad a bhfuil ar eolas agat tá mé mac?_ ”   

  * **"How long have you known?  How long have you know I have a son?"**



“ _Fuair mé amach i mí Aibreáin.  Ba timpiste._ _Ní raibh a fhios aici go raibh mé sa bhaile._ ”

  * **"I found out in April.  It was an accident.  She didn't know I was in town."**



“ _Conas is nach bhféadfaí tú a insint dom Liam_ _?!_ ”

  * **"How could you not tell me Liam?!"**



“ _Dúirt mé leat sula, ní raibh sé ar mo rún a insint._ ”  Killian dropped into the chair across from Liam and sighed.

  * **"I told you before, it was not my secret to tell."**



“I met him today.  Emma didn’t tell me.  I got to the tea shop early and saw him coloring at a table.  We got to talking and Emma came out from the back and she admitted it.”

“How did Brady take it?  Meeting his Papa?”

“He was excited.  Happier than I would think one would feel meeting their father for the first time.”

“I figured he’d be like that.  Brady is a wonderful boy.”

“You’ve spent a lot of time with him?”

“Since I met him last month, yes.  Emma has graciously allowed me to spend time with him.  I’ve picked him up from daycare a few times and taken him to eat and to the park.”

“Did he know you were my brother?”

“Yes, he asked about you a few times.  I told him about you, but I didn’t go too into detail because he deserved to learn about you on his own.”

“ _Go raibh maith agat deartháir._ ”

  * **"Thank you brother."**



“ _Tá tú deartháir beag fáilte roimh chách._ ”

  * **"You're welcome little brother."**



“ _Cá mhéad uair is gá dom a insint duit Liam?  G_ _o bhfuil sé deartháir 'níos óige'._ ”

  * **"How many times must I tell you Liam?  It's 'younger' brother."**



 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**_May 2011_ **

_Emma collapsed against the front door as soon she shut it in Killian’s face.  Mary Margaret hurried forward from the couch where she and David had been waiting for her to tell Killian about the baby._

_“I didn’t tell him.  I couldn’t ruin his life that way!  He got into the school he wanted, to study what he wanted and it’s all the way in California.”  Killian’s voice grew louder as he kept hitting the front door with his fists, pleading with Emma to come out and speak with him._

_“Do you want me to ask him to go?” asked David._

_“Please Daddy.  Don’t tell him about the baby.”_

_“I won’t.”  David went outside and they heard him telling Killian to leave.  When Killian refused, David came back inside and called Liam to come get him.  They listened as Killian kept calling for her as they waited for his brother to get there.  When Liam arrived, David went outside to help him load Killian into the car._

_When Liam had arrived, Emma had retreated to her bedroom upstairs.  She’d changed into pajamas and lay in her bed.  She was heartbroken that she’d broken up with Killian, but it was for the best.  Emma refused to force something like a baby that he might not even want on him and told her parents as much._

_“His reaction might surprise you honey”, said David._

_“Daddy…he proposed to me.  He said he didn’t want to start the next step of his life without me and proposed so we could move to California together.  How could I ruin his dream by basically saying we couldn’t move because I was having a baby?!”_

_“Oh, my baby”, Mary Margaret crooned as she pulled Emma into a hug._

_“I don’t want to go back to school.  I don’t_ need _to.  You know I have more than enough credits to graduate.  By the time we graduate next month, it will be obvious and Killian will know.  Please don’t make me go back.”_

_“Ok honey.  Don’t worry.  I’ll go up to the school and talk to Principal Hopper to get it all straightened out, okay?”_

_“Thank you Daddy.  What would I do without you?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to let you guys know how the story is going with updates on Twitter (@BlackWidowNat4) or tumblr (BlackWidowNat2814).
> 
> Don't forget to leave me a comment and kudos if you haven't already! Thanks again!!


	6. Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian and Emma finally have that talk...and we see what went down on October 31, 2011.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not much to say except that I hope you enjoy the chapter because it's an important one.
> 
> Thanks again to my beta bestie best Courtney...without her, you guys wouldn't be getting the polished work you get now.

**[Outfit Collection for Chapter 6](http://www.polyvore.com/chapter_guess_whos_coming_to/collection?id=5473305) **

* * *

 

**_October 2011_ **

_Emma sat straight up in bed, hand clutching her belly.  The sharp pain that had woken her was still going and she couldn’t stop the loud groan that escaped her lips._

_“Aggghhhhh!”  When the contraction stopped, she heard her parents hurrying down the hallway and her bedroom flew open.  “Mom, Dad!”_

_“Has your water broken honey?” asked Mary Margaret and Emma shook her head._

_“No, but it hurt so much!”  Emma sat up and threw her legs over the side of the bed._

_“How about I go get you a warm glass of milk?  To help you go back to sleep”, said David.  Emma nodded and David left the room._

_“Shouldn’t we head to the hospital?” asked Emma._

_“Your contractions aren’t close enough yet and your water hasn’t broken”, replied Mary Margaret as she helped her daughter sit up in bed against the headboard._

_David returned then with the glass of milk and handed it to Emma._

_“Thanks Daddy.”  She sipped at her milk and when she finished, David took the glass and he and Mary Margaret said good night.  Her mother turned back to Emma as she stepped out the bedroom door._

_“Oh, and Emma?  Happy 19 th birthday.”_

~*~*~*~*~*~

**June 2016**

Emma’s house looked exactly the same as when he’d last seen it.  Killian clutched at the toy he’d picked up for his son: from _Jake and the Neverland Pirates_ , a plush Captain Hook with interchangeable hook attachments.  He started when he felt a hand land on his shoulder.  Liam gave him a smile.

“ _Tóg go bog é, Killian._ ”

  * **“Relax, Killian.”**



“ _A cheapann tú go mbeidh sé maith liom é?_ ”

  * **“You think he’ll like it?”**



“ _Tá mé cinnte go mbeidh sé breá liom í._ ”

  * **“I’m sure he will love it.”**



Before they could continue, the front door flew open and his son flew down the front the front steps.  Killian handed Liam the doll and turned back to his son.

“Papa!”  Brady catapulted himself into Killian’s open arms and he spun his son around and squeezed him in a tight hug.  “I missed you.”

“I missed you too little man.”  Killian heard a small laugh from the porch and looked up to see Emma leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed and smile on her face.  He was struck with how beautiful she was ( _always had been, really_ ).  He felt as if his heart gave a little skip in his chest, reminding him of feelings he thought long gone.

“Hello Emma.”

“Hey Killian, Liam.”  After prodding from Brady, Emma had texted to invite Liam to the dinner that night as well and his older brother was more than happy to attend, enjoying anytime he could spend with his nephew.

Brady wriggled from his father’s arms and dropped to the ground, taking Killian’s hand in his and pulling him to the house.

“Grammy!  Grandpa!  Papa and Uncle Liam are here!” he called as they walked inside.  Mary Margaret and David appeared in the front hall from the kitchen with smiles on their faces.

“Hey guys, come on in!  Take a seat in the living room, dinner’s almost ready”, said David.  Liam stepped forward and handed over a bottle of wine he’d brought with them.

“I wasn’t sure what we were having, so I hope that this is okay.”

“It’s perfectly fine Liam, thank you”, replied Mary Margaret.

“We’re having pasketti!” Brady said excitedly.  “With meatballs!  It’s my favorite.”

“Last week cheeseburgers were your favorite and before that it was grilled cheese sandwiches”, said Emma.

“They’re okay”, Brady replied, with the nonchalance of someone much older than four and a half.  “Grilled cheese is _your_ favorite Momma.”

“True.”  Killian sat on the couch across from her and Brady sat next to him.

“Would you like to know a secret my boy?” he asked Brady and his son nodded wildly with a big grin.  “Spaghetti and meatballs are my favorite too.”

“Really Papa?”

“Yup.  I like it with lots of parmesan.”

“Me too!”  Brady was so excited to be just like his Papa and it made Emma smile and laugh where she sat across from them.  Killian looked up at her and that feeling he’d felt when they’d arrived struck him again.  Seeing her so carefree and happy, and despite what had been revealed that day, he couldn’t help but feel the stirrings of the love he’d once held for her begin to come back with a vengeance.

“Well, no one can say he isn’t your son”, said Emma.  An awkward silence spread into the room, and Brady looked at his parents and uncle wondering what was wrong.  Liam broke the awkwardness when he gave a slight cough.

“ _Killian, an bronntanas?_ ”

  * **“Killian, the gift?”**



“ _Ceart._ ”

  * **“Right.”**



“What’s that Papa?” Brady asked.

“What’s what?”

“You were talking funny with Uncle Liam.”

“It’s called Irish.  Uncle Liam and I learned it when we were little boys like you.  My mum taught it to us.”

“Can she teach me?”

“I’m sorry my boy, but she and our Da passed a long time ago.  But, if you really want to learn, Uncle Liam or I could teach you.”

“Okay.”  Brady thought for a second.  “What did he say?”

“Uncle Liam reminded me of something I brought for you, a present.”

“You brought me a present Papa?”  Killian nodded and Brady crawled into his lap.

“Close your eyes for me okay?”  Brady closed his eyes, scrunching up his little face and put his little hands out.  Liam handed Hook over to Killian and he placed it into his son’s hands.  “Open up.”

“Papa!”  Brady gasped and his little mouth formed an ‘O’ in surprise.  “I love it!  It’s perfect!”  He jumped from his father’s lap and went over to Emma.  “Look Momma!”

“Wow!  That’s pretty cool.  And he even has different hooks”, she said.  “Go and thank your papa.”  Emma held onto Hook while Brady went to hug Killian.

“Thanks Papa, it’s going to be my favoritest ever!”  Emma was freeing Hook from his twist ties when her parents came into the room.

“Dinner’s ready!” chirped Mary Margaret.  Brady took the newly freed pirate from his mother and hugged him close as they all went into the dining room.

“Can I sit next to my Papa?”

“Peanut, I’m sure he wants to eat his dinner and not worry--”

" _Please_ Momma?"

“It’s fine Swan.”  It took him a few seconds to realize what he’d said and when he did, his eyes locked with hers. “Sor-”

“Don't worry about it.”  He saw the slight pink tinge to her cheeks and something like a wistful look on her face before she looked away.

Emma went to a hall closet and pulled out a booster seat and buckled it to the chair next to Killian.  Normally, someone Brady’s age probably wouldn’t be using a booster seat, but the Nolan’s table was a little high for him to eat properly and so he used the booster when he was at his grandparent’s house. 

Knowing the procedure already, Brady climbed up and took a seat, settling Captain Hook on the empty chair next to him.  Emma who sat across from them, got Killian’s attention.

“Make sure you roll up his sleeves…and you’re going to have to cut the noodles for him too.”  Killian looked down at his son, smiling at the fact that Brady was already sticking his arms out towards him.

“I can do that.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Dinner was a bit of a quiet affair.  Everyone mainly concentrated on eating and Killian focused on helping Brady and making sure he didn’t get dirty.  Any other person might have gotten exasperated at the situation, but he relished in it.

Having been absent from his son’s first five(ish) years of life made him crave every kind of interaction and moment that Emma and her parents had been able to have over the last years.

“So, Killian…” started David.  “What have you been up to?”  The unstated _‘since you and Emma broke up and she had your son and didn’t tell you’_ left unspoken but a little implied.

“Well, I actually graduated a year early and got a job working for Tiber Ship Building.  I’ve been with them ever since.”

“I always knew you could do it Killian”, said Emma and he noted the slight blush in the apples of her cheeks. 

“Thank you, Emma.  It’s my dream job and I love it.  Seattle is an interesting city.”

“Werffs Sheatul Papa?” Brady asked with a mouthful of meatball.

“Brady, we don’t talk with our mouths full”, said Emma.  He looked properly chastised and finished swallowing/chewing his meatball.

“Sorry Momma”, he said then turned back to Killian, asking once again, “Where’s Seattle Papa?”

“It’s in Washington, on the other side of the States.”

“I’ve never left Storybrooke.  Is it like here?”

“Kind of.  If it’s okay with your mum, we can see it one day.”

“Okay!”  He went back to his ‘pasketti’ and left the room in another awkward silence.

“So, David, are you still with the department?” Killian asked.

“Yeah, I’ve actually been Sheriff for the last three years.  Keith Traval finally retired and they voted me in.  This one here”, David jerked his thumb towards Brady, “loves to visit when I’m on shift.  It’s pretty quiet here, as you know, so he goes on patrol with me sometimes.”

“And Grandpa lets me play with the siren!”

“Does he now?” asked Killian.

“That he does.  I’ve seen them driving around town and once, I was even ‘arrested’ by Officer Brady”, said Liam, making air quotes around the word arrested.

“You what?”

“Yeah, your son cuffed me and then threw me in the brig.”

“It was fun Papa.”

“ _So_ _much_ fun”, added Liam in a town dripping with sarcasm.  Killian couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of his brother being ‘arrested’ by a four-year-old.

“I have pictures”, said Emma.  “I could show you after dinner.”

“Whyyyy?” Liam whined and it made Killian laugh even harder.

“And how about yourself Mary Margaret?” Killian continued when he finally stopped laughing.

“Still teaching the first graders, but I’m also Vice Principal now.”

“Congratulations!  I’m sure you’re much nicer than old Vice Principal Gold was.  He was mean, a downright imp.”

“And kinda weird and scary too”, added Emma.

When dinner was over, Brady grabbed his Captain Hook and Uncle Liam and went to play in the living room while Emma and Killian excused themselves.

“Shall we go step outside, Emma?” Killian asked her.  She nodded,

“Yeah, we should.”  They both went over to where Brady was with Liam and his grandparents.  “Peanut?”  Brady looked up from his new toy.

“Yes Momma?”

“Papa and I are going to talk, okay?  We’ll be right outside.”

“Okay.”  He went back to trying to change out the new attachments on Hook’s hook.  Emma gave a small hum that sounded like a laugh.

“Well, don’t miss us _too_ much.”

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

Killian sat on the porch swing where Emma had broken his heart five years ago as she began to pace back and forth.

“Relax Emma.  Just sit down.”  She sighed loudly and kept pacing.

“No, no.  I can think better this way.”

“Fine then.”  She was quiet as he watched her try to figure out how to start.  “When’s his birthday?”  Emma stopped and sat on the railing.

“Halloween.  He was born a week--”

“--after you.”

“Yeah.”

“Why did you choose that name?”

“For you.  I named him Brady for _you_.  I didn’t have you near me, so I thought it would be the next best thing.  His middle name is Flynn.”

“How did you choose that?”

“ _Tangled_ was playing on the TV in my hospital room after I woke up from giving birth.  Flynn Rider had just given Rapunzel ‘the Smolder’ and it made me think of the looks you’d give me sometimes.”

“At least it wasn’t Eugene Fitzherbert.”  Killian laughed and felt lighthearted as he watched Emma laugh as well.

“Yeah, at least it wasn’t Eugene…”  Their laughter died off and Emma looked down at the floor.

“Just answer me this, Emma”, said Killian, “Why?  Why didn’t you tell me?  Why did you break my heart?”  He heard a small sniffle and saw that Emma was wiping at her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater dress.  “Please Emma.  Tell me.  You owe me that.”

“I was going to.  I’d only just found out myself because I’d gone to the doctor a couple days before that.  I think it happened on your birthday.  You remember the boat?”

“Of course I do.  It was the greatest night of my life.  I still have the compass you know, it’s one of my most prized possessions.  It sits on my desk at work in a small glass case.  You never realized what you’d given me.”

“What are you talking about?” asked Emma.

“The compass had the name Henry Every on it.  He was a real pirate hundreds of years ago and lived in the time before Calico Jack and Blackbeard.  He inspired some of the greatest pirates the world has ever known.”

“Wow.”

“When I was in California, I had it looked at in a museum, to be sure.  Ever since then, I’ve had offers to buy it; thousands, hundreds of thousands, and one crazy bloke from the British Museum in London offered me a million pounds.”

“What?!  And you didn’t sell it to him?  Killian, that’s almost…$1.5 million!”

“How could you even think that I would just toss it away so carelessly?  Something that _you_ had given me? It was all I had left of you!” Killian practically yelled as he stood up.  He took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair.  “Tell me why.  Please.”  Emma was outright crying now and wiped more tears.

“I was afraid you’d leave me because of him.  That you didn’t want a baby.  We were children Killian.”

“We were adults!  We were both 18 and I had the right to decide on my own.”

“Let me finish, please.  Before I can’t anymore.”  Killian sat back on the swing and waved a hand for her to go on.

“Please do explain why you didn’t tell me you were pregnant”, he said with a slight hint of venom in his voice.  He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t get mad, that he would stay calm while she spoke, but it was getting hard to do so.

“I was going to.  You remember I was nervous when you came to my house that day.”

“Yes.”

“I let you go first because you looked so happy.  You were so excited about getting into that school and to be able to build and design ships.  I could tell.  You couldn’t wait to get to California and I couldn’t take that away from you.”

“I wanted you to come with me Swan.  I never wanted to be parted from you.”  He ignored the look in her eyes when he used the nickname he gave her long ago.

“How were you going to study for tests and write papers with a newborn?  How were you going to get the proper amount of sleep when he’d be up crying at all hours of the night?”

“We would’ve figured it out!  We would’ve made it work!”  He shot up from his seat, fists clenched.  “I would have gladly applied to a school here in New England.  I would have given up California in a heartbeat for both of you!”

“That’s the point Killian!  You shouldn’t have to ‘make it work’!” she cried.  “I didn’t want you to give up your dream!  I wasn’t going to do that to you and make you resent me…make you resent _him_.”

“Don’t you dare say that I could _ever_ have grown to resent my son!  Or you, for that matter because I _loved_ you, with every beat of my heart and with every breath, to the end of this world and the next.  And Brady…I’ve only known him a handful of hours and I already can’t see myself living without seeing him every single day.”

“I’m so sorry Killian.  I’m just so sorry.”  He watched as began to cry harder, her shoulders shaking with sobs.  Killian did the only natural thing he could and pulled her into his arms, running his hand up and down her back as he tried to soothe her.  “I-I know th-th-that I have to face the harsh t-truth that I will n-n-never have your love again for what I’ve kept and taken f-from you, but I hope that one d-day you can forgive me…and we can start over as f-friends.”

“Friends?”  He didn’t want to be just friends with Emma Nolan.  Yes, he was angry, but he had his reasons and they were beyond legitimate: She had lied when she broke up with him.  She had kept their son’s existence from him.  She hadn’t trusted that with Brady in their lives, he wouldn’t have been more than willing to give up going to school in California.  She had made decisions for him that he wouldn’t have hesitated making himself.

“Yeah.”  Her voice sounded like that decision was killing her on the inside as much as it was killing him.

“Will you tell me about the day he was born?  Please?”

“Of course.”

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

**_October 31, 2011_ **

_Emma was settled on the couch with a bowl of popcorn on her belly and_ It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown _playing on the television.  She was in the middle of laughing at something Snoopy and Woodstock were doing when she felt a stabbing pain in her lower back, just like the week before._

_“SONOFABITCH!”  Mary Margaret raced in just as Emma stood from the couch, knocking the bowl to the ground and spilling the kernels everywhere.  “Mom!”_

_“It might be time Emma sweetheart.”  As soon as she said that, there was a splat on the wooden floor and the floor was covered in liquid.  “Never mind.”  Mary Margaret hurried into the laundry room and came back with a change of clothes for Emma, who was sitting on the couch clutching her belly._

_“Mom!  It hurts!  WHY DOES THIS HURT SO MUCH?!”_

_“It’s just contractions.  Here, take my hand and breathe sweetie.  Just breathe okay?”_

_“STOP SAYING BREATHE!”_

_“Okay, okay.”  When the contraction was over, Mary Margaret ran her hand over Emma’s hair.  “Better?”_

_“Yeah.  Thanks Mom, I’m sorry I yelled.”_

_“Don’t worry honey, I did the same to your father when I went into labor with you.”  Mary Margaret kissed Emma’s forehead.  “Now, let’s get you changed and get your father to get us to the hospital.”_

_Her mom helped her get changed and then called for David._

_“DAVID!  GET THE HOSPITAL BAG!” Mary Margaret yelled up to the second floor._

_“WHAT?”  Emma heard her dad yell from the second floor._

_“EMMA IS IN LABOR DAVID!  GET THE BAG AND LET’S GO!”  Emma laughed as she heard a thud upstairs and her father’s heavy footfalls across the hall and down the stairs, where he appeared disheveled and eyes wild, red and black polka dot overnight bag in hand._

_“Let’s go!”  Mary Margaret helped Emma stand and followed David out to his police cruiser.  He flipped on the sirens and took off towards Storybrooke General._

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

_“GIVE ME DRUGS NOW!”_

_“Emma…”_

_“If you say ‘breathe’ one more time, I swear to the sweet God Almighty…”_

_“GAAAAHHHH!”  The nurse tending to Emma read the output of the fetal monitor._

_“Don’t worry, this contraction’s almost over and Dr. Whale is on his way.”_

_“Thanks Anna”, said David as she left.  He turned back to his wife and daughter.  “How about I go get you some more ice chips?”_

_“Thank you Daddy.”  While David was gone, Dr. Whale arrived._

_“Hey Emma, how are we doing?” he asked._

_“Really?  I’m pushing a watermelon out of a frickin’ keyhole…how do you think I’m doing?!”_

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

(“Did you really say that Swan?”

“Of course I did.”  The fact that he was freely using the nickname once again was making her blush to the highest degree.  “Can I finish?”

“Please continue.”)

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

_Anna helped Emma get situated for delivery and when the monitor announced a contraction, Dr. Whale got ready at her feet._

_“Okay, on this contraction, push!” he said.  “Push, now!”_

_Emma pushed and yelled in pain, with Mary Margaret at her side and holding her hand._

_“You can rest now sweetie.”  David’s voice filtered in just then,_

_“I have ice chips!”_

_“Best stay outside David”, Mary Margaret called back._

_“Are you sure?”  They all turned when they heard the door open,_

_“Dad!  Get out!”_

_“Whoop, yeah.  I’ll be out here.”  David shut the door and Dr. Whale turned back to Emma._

_“There’s another contraction coming, get ready to push.”  Emma shook her head._

_“No, no.  I can’t do this.”_

_“Emma, there’s no stopping this”, said Mary Margaret._

_“No.  I can’t do this without him.  Please Mom, I need Killian.  I can’t have this baby without him.”  Mary Margaret smiled and caressed Emma’s cheek._

_“I’m sorry baby, but Killian’s not here, remember?  He’s in California, away at school.”_

_“Right.  Yeah.”  Emma’s head fell back on the bed, unconscious.  She was unaware of her mother crying, yelling for her father.  She was unaware of Dr. Whale and Anna running her hospital bed to an OR to perform a C-Section._

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

(“What happened?” asked Killian.

“Brady turned out to be breach, butt end first and not his head”, replied Emma.  “On top of which, I had some kind of blood clot or something.  It’s why I fainted and kind of thought you were still around.  I didn’t remember that I’d chased you away.”

“Did you really ask for me then?”

“Yeah.”  Emma wiped a tear from her cheek.  “The second I found out I was pregnant, I started thinking about the day I would go into labor and how much I wanted you to be there.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”)

_~*~*~*~*~*~_

_It felt like days later when Emma finally woke up.  The room wasn’t as bright as when she was in labor, but the TV was on and_ Tangled _was playing.  Flynn Rider was tied up in a chair with Rapunzel’s hair.  (“Alright, you’ve left me no choice.  Here comes the Smolder.”)  Emma laughed lightly, and sat up to look around for her parents when she heard someone come in the room._

_“Mom?  Dad?”_

_“Hey Princess, your mom is watching over the baby at the nursery”, said David as he shut the door._

_“What is it?” she asked.  “Boy or girl?”_

_“How about we get them to bring the baby over?”  Emma nodded and David stepped out.  10 minutes later, David and Mary Margaret came back, followed by a nurse carrying the baby._

_“Emma, I’d like you to meet your son”, said Anna as she placed him in Emma’s arms.  
_

_“Son?  I have a son?”_

_“Yeah.  We have a grandson”, said David._

_“So”, asked Anna, “As of right now, he’s just Baby Nolan.  We need a name to put on the birth certificate.  Have you decided on one?”_

_“Brady like his dad.”_

_“I thought Killian’s name was well…Killian”, said David._

_“Brady is his middle name.”_

_“Okay, how about this little one’s middle name?”_

_“Flynn.”  Emma smiled as she kissed her son’s forehead.  “Everyone meet my son: Brady Flynn Nolan-Jones.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Besides the usual request for a comment, please let me know what you think of the Polyvore sets I attach and the use of Irish between Killian and Liam. Do you guys like either of the things? If no one really does, please let me know and I won't bother with 'em anymore. Also, there was a bit near the end (not in the flashback) that was inspired by what Darcy says to Elizabeth in his letter in PPZ, so not entirely my words.  
> ~*~*~*~  
> Also, if you haven't read 'The Fluffy Problem' on FFN by effulgentcolors, go do it now...it's hilarious and awesome. I mean, Killian is turned into a kitten you guys. Not even a grown cat...A KITTEN!!  
> (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9660007/1/The-Fluffy-Problem)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the long wait. School got in the way...as per usual. This is somewhat of a filler chapter, but exciting things are on their way, I promise you.
> 
> I decided to try something new with the translations. I'll start the conversation in Irish, with the translations right after (like normal) and then just leave it italicized to show that they're still speaking in a different language. This way I don't butcher the awesome language that is Irish too much thanks to Google Translate.
> 
> Lastly, thanks (as always), to my bestest beta bff Courtney for the help!!!

**June 2016**

Once again, Killian couldn’t sleep.  He had no idea why he wasn’t angrier with Emma for what she’d done.  It wasn’t that he _wasn’t_ angry, it’s just that he hadn’t blown up the way he thought he should’ve.  Liam pointed out to him that he was probably bottling it up and it was going to explode at the worst possible time.

He stared at the ceiling, hoping and praying that that wasn’t the case.  He didn’t want to ruin what he had with Brady by making his son scared of him or hate him.

Sighing, he gave up trying to sleep in and got dressed.  Liam was still asleep, so Killian decided to walk into town and have his breakfast at Granny’s.  As soon as the bell above the door jingled, and Killian had barely stepped inside the diner, there was a small shout.

“Papa!”  Killian looked up and Brady was slipping off one of the stools at the counter and running towards him.  He crouched to catch Brady in his arms and swung him up into the air.

“Hey my boy, how are we this morning?”

“The bestest now that I got to see my papa!”  As his tiny arms encircled him in a hug, Killian became acutely aware that the din of the diner had gone down and everyone was watching him.  Brady completely ignored it all and jumped down from Killian’s arms, taking his right hand in his smaller one.  “Come on!  You have to have breakfast with me and Grandpa.”

Killian helped Brady back up onto the stool next to David and then took a seat on Brady’s other side.

“’Morning Mr. Nolan”, he said with a nod.  Killian would call David Mr. Nolan on occasion (but not always), because it reminded him of _Pirates of the Caribbean_ when Will talks with Elizabeth’s father.

“Killian, how many times do I have to tell you to call me David?”

“At least once more, Mr. Nolan.”

“Still one of your favorite movies, isn’t it?”

“Of course sir. Always will be.”  Killian was pulled from his hello with David by a tug on his shirt sleeve.

“Whuff moofy dush ganpa mean?”  He smiled and rejoiced inwardly at his first opportunity to correct his son’s manners.

“Brady, would you like to know a secret?”  His little boy nodded his head enthusiastically.  “The secret is that a proper gentleman _never_ speaks with his mouth full.”

“Sorry Papa”, Brady replied after swallowing his mouthful of pancake.

“Just make sure you remember from now on.”

“Yes Papa.”  Brady turned back to his food as Killian ordered pancakes and some bacon and coffee from Granny.  While he waited, Brady turned to David this time.

“Grandpa?”

“Yeah kid?”

“Can Papa go with us to the library today?”

“I don’t see why not.  Ask him.”  Brady clung to the counter and rotated his chair to face Killian.

“Papa, will you come with us to the library for story-time with Miss Belle?”

“Of course.”

After breakfast, the three of them walked a block over to the library, where Killian was immediately enveloped into a hug by Belle, the librarian.

“Killian Jones!  I’d heard you were back in town.  You’ve been here a month and didn’t come and see me?  Or Will?”  Killian pulled back from the hug and cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Wait. Will?  As in _Will Scarlet?_ ” he asked incredulously.  “You’re married to Scarlet?”

“Going on two years now.”

“Where’s the git these days?”  Belle laughed.

“He works in the forest department with Robin.”  The catching up had to be put on pause when the rest of the usual story-time group arrived and everyone went to take their seats in the children’s corner.  The kids knew the routine by then so they all plopped onto the floor in front of a big comfy chair while the parents wandered around the library finding things to read for themselves.

Brady took a seat next to a little boy the David told Killian was Roland Locksley and they were jabbering away until Belle started reading.

After a while of watching his son so enraptured in the book Belle was reading ( _Edwina, the Dinosaur Who Didn’t Know She Was Extinct_ ), Killian spoke.

“I never would’ve left David.  How could she keep my son from me?”  Killian turned to David.  “How could she say she loved me and then lie to me?”

“Killian, it’s not me who you should be talking to about this.  You have to talk with Emma.”  David sighed and looked over at his grandson with a smile, “For what it’s worth, and as much as it pains me to say it, she never stopped loving you.  The stress of what had happened was bad enough that the doctor told her it could affect the baby.”

“I wanted to marry her David.  I loved her, I love her still.  But how can I trust her?”

“Talk to her.  That’s all you can do.  Both of you need to talk some more.  A semi-heated argument on our porch isn’t going to get to the root of all the issues.  You need to have a _long_ talk about _everything._ ”

After story-time, they walked to the shop where Emma was waiting for Brady.  While he sat at his favorite table to enjoy his hot chocolate while his grandpa enjoyed tea and a scone, Killian pulled Emma aside.

“We need talk.”

“I thought we already had?”

“That wasn’t enough and you know it.”

“You’re right.”  Emma sighed and turned to look at a calendar on the wall.  “These next couple of days are busy.  How about Friday night?  It’s ‘Fun Sleepover with Uncle Liam’ night and Brady’s really been looking forward to it since he missed it twice last month.  We had to postpone them…until you knew.”

“Of course, understandable.”

“Be here at the shop around seven?  Will have dinner and talk.  I’ll show you Brady’s baby books.”

“Are you asking me on a date Swan?”  Emma’s cheeks got a little pink and she scoffed at him.

“Psh.  Of course I’m not asking you on a date”, she replied and he felt his heart fall somewhat.  “After keeping the fact that you have a son from you, I’m pretty sure it’s not something you’d ever want with me again.”

That simple statement made the hope in Killian’s heart flair just a bit; she may still have still harbor feelings for him.  He thought back to David’s words earlier and it made him happier.  The only questions were could he trust her again and would he ever truly forgive her?

“Well, never assume things Emma”, he said with a wink.  “You know what they say.”  He took her hand and kissed her across the knuckles.  “I’ll see you Friday.”

“Oh, um…okay.”  Emma pulled her hand from his and cradled it to her chest.  “Brady, your papa’s leaving, come say goodbye.” 

Brady jumped down from his chair and ran to where Killian stood with outstretched arms, saying _Oof_ when his son landed in his arms.

“Can you take me to daycare tomorrow papa?” Brady asked as he looked up at Killian with the Jones family eyes.  Killian was already helpless to deny his son anything he asked.

“If it’s okay with mummy, then of course.”  All Brady had to do was turn his head to look at Emma, he didn’t even have to speak.

“It’s cool peanut, you don’t have to use the puppy dog eyes on me.  Papa will take you tomorrow.”

“Yay!  I can’t wait tell Roland and Phillip and Alex and Dex that my papa is coming!”  Brady squeezed him once more and hopped from his arms.  “I’ll see you tomorrow Papa and you can meet all my friends!”

“I can’t wait.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

The next day was one of Killian’s favorite since finding out he was a father; meeting his little boy’s friends was an experience.  Roland Locksley was his best friend but he also played with Phillip Jr. (son of Aurora & Phillip Morris), Alex (daughter of Sean and Ashley Herman, who were also known as Cinderella and her Prince), and Dex (or Declan, Graham and Rose’s son).

Not only did Killian get to see his son with his friends, but Killian got to catch up with people he knew in high school that he hadn’t seen in years.

On Thursday, he was spending the afternoon with Brady at the park when he received a call.

“Jones here.”

 _“Mr. Jones, it’s Smee.”_   William Smee was his assistant at Tiber.

“Ah, Mr. Smee.  I’m on vacation and you know I don’t like to be bothered.”

 _“I have Mr. Silver on the line for you sir.  He says it’s important that he speak to you.”_   Killian sighed; John Silver was the absolute worst.

“Go ahead.”  There was a click on the line and the man in question spoke,

_“Jones.  You’ve been gone long enough.  It’s time to come back.”_

“Sir, with all due respect, the situation is not what it used to be.  Therefore, I must let you know that I will be here longer than anticipated.”

 _“I allowed you leave for a month.  It has now been almost six weeks.”_   Killian was starting to get frustrated and let out an exasperated sigh.

“Sir…”

 _“It’s plain to see where your loyalties lay Jones.  If you do not return by Monday, you will be fired, do you understand?”_   Killian knew he should be angrier, but part of him didn’t really seem to care.

“In that case, _sir_ , thank you for the opportunity of working for you.  I’ll have Smee send you my letter of resignation.”  He hung up before Silver could say another word and quickly emailed Smee about the situation.  He assured Killian he’d take care of sending the resignation letter and promised to send out some résumés for him as well.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

Friday dawned and Killian was nervous.  He lay in bed that morning wondering about seeing Emma that night.

“Killian, I can practically hear you thinking from down here!” called Liam.  “Just get your arse out of bed and come have breakfast, we can talk.”  Killian kicked the covers away and stumbled into his bathroom and made his way downstairs after cleaning up. 

 _“_ _Tae, deartháir beag?”_ Liam asked.  Killian rolled his eyes and took a seat at the driftwood kitchen table.

  * **“Tea, little brother?”**



_“_ Deartháir níos óige _, agus tá, ba mhaith liom buíochas roinnt tae_ _.”_

  * **“ _Younger_ brother, and yes, I would like some tea.”**



They didn’t say anything as they sipped the Irish Breakfast Tea, just sat in contemplation.  When Killian finished, Liam stood and took their tea cups to the sink.

 _“_ _Labhair liom._ _Cad atá ag cur ort sa giúmar? Nach bhfuil tú ag féachaint ar Emma tráthnóna inniu?”_ asked Liam as he rinsed their cups.  _“_ _Ba chóir duit a bheith sásta.”_

  * **“Talk to me. What is putting you in this mood?  Are you not seeing Emma this evening?  You should be happy.”**



_“_ _Tá mé, deartháir…”_

  * **“I am, brother…”**



_“Ach…”_

  * **“But…”**



_“_ _But I love her…still.  Even after what she kept from me.”_

_“Are you going to tell her?”_

_“I really want to.  I want to tell her I thought of her every single day and that no woman ever compared to her.  I want to tell her that I want to give everything to her and our boy, that I want to live out the rest of my life with them.”_

_“Then tell her.”_

_“How?  How do I tell her this when, despite everything, I still don’t know if I can trust her?”_

Liam could only shrug at his younger brother, hoping and praying that Emma didn’t break his heart once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would also like to make note that yes, I know Killian hasn't shown all that much anger as to what happened. It's coming though. He's bottled it all up and anyone's who's had any sort of a basic science class will know that when you bottle something up, it'll eventually explode...


	8. We Need to Talk. Wait...That Sounds Way Too Ominous.  Still Though...We Need to Talk.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment of truth...

_June 2011_

_Killian was gone.  Emma had spent the last month at home, basically in seclusion.  The only times she’d left the house and her room were for doctor’s appointments.  She hadn’t wanted anyone to know her secret and in the couple of weeks after Killian had left, her belly had finally popped._

_Emma lay in bed, running her hand over her belly and thinking about her latest doctor’s appointment.  The ultrasound tech had asked if she wanted to know the gender, and Emma really did, but it didn’t feel right to do it without Killian, so she’d said no.  Everything was okay with the baby, all healthy so far and growing right.  Her test for gestational diabetes came back negative, so she could sigh in relief._

_“I love you so much already little peanut.  I mean, I know you’re not peanut sized anymore…”  Emma pulled up Google on her phone and found what size the baby was by now.  “You more like the size of…an ear of corn?  That’s so weird.”  She locked her phone and lay it on top of her belly, sighing._

_“Would you like to hear a story Peanut?”  Suddenly, her phone wobbled and moved around and Emma’s hand flew to her belly and felt more kicks against it.  “I take that as a yes then.”_

_The little one kept a steady samba going as Emma sat up a bit more, tossing her phone to the side and replacing it with both her hands._

_“Once upon a time, there was a little boy and a little girl.  These two loved each other so very much, and when they grew up, the girl knew she wanted to marry the boy.  But one day, she did something awful and it hurt the boy’s feelings and he left.  The girl cried and cried, wishing she could take it back, so that the boy would love her again…because despite everything, she promised herself that she would_ never _stop loving him.”_

_Emma felt a steady stream of kicks against her hands._

_“Not much for that ending huh?” she asked. There was a quiet knock at her bedroom door.  “Come in.”_

_“Hey princess.”  David stuck his head in and smiled.  “How are you and the baby?”_

_“Not bad.  I was just telling him or her a story.  They didn’t like it.”  David took a seat next to Emma on the bed.  “Been kicking like nobody’s business.  Probably gets it from Killian and his love of soccer.”  They both ignored the awkward silence until David broke it._

_“Well…um…how about I tell a story this time?”_

_“Please.”  Emma snuggled into her father’s side, placing her head on his shoulder._

_“Once upon a time, in a realm far away from here called the Enchanted Forest, there was a bandit princess and a shepherd prince…”_

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

**June 2016**

Emma handed [Brady](http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=209628278) his _Jake_ backpack and the Captain Hook doll Killian had given him.  Her son was practically bouncing with excitement at the impending sleepover with Uncle Liam because that meant he got to spend some time alone with his papa too. 

Liam leaned against the kitchen counter, arms crossed.

“Don’t worry Emma, everything’s going to be fine.  I know what to give him and what not to give him.  I’ll make sure Killian does too, when he makes it home.”  Liam winked at her, “ _If_ he makes it home.”

Emma just rolled her eyes and felt her cheeks warm and knew she was turning pink.

“That isn’t going to happen Liam.  I’m pretty sure it’ll never happen again, so don’t start.”

“Emma…”

“I said don’t.”  Liam held his hands up.

“Fine”, he acquiesced, “But, for what it’s worth, I think you’re wrong.  The both of you.  The sooner you see it, the sooner everything is the way it should be.”

“Liam!”  Emma felt a small tug on her shirt and she looked down to see Brady with an inquisitive look on his little face.

“Mama?”  She knelt down to Brady’s eye level.

“Yes Peanut?”

“Why are you mad at Uncle Liam?”

“I’m not baby.  He’s just making me think of things that make me a little sad.”  Emma looked up at Liam over Brady’s head and saw him rolling his eyes.  Her attention was pulled back to her son when he grabbed her cheeks with his small hands.

“Don’t be sad Mama!  I love you!”  Brady gave her a big wet kiss on the forehead.

“Thanks kid.”  She adjusted the straps on his backpack.  “Now, go grab your hat.”

“Yes Mama.”  Brady ran off towards the coat rack, backpack swinging side to side.

“If you guys go and eat or something with Killian tomorrow, make sure he knows about Brady’s allergy, okay?”

“Stop worrying Emma.”

“His EPI pen is in his bag…”

“Emma…don’t worry.  It’s not like this is the first time.”

“You’re right.  I guess I’m just nervous about tonight.”

“Uncle Liam!  It’s time to go!” Brady’s little voice broke into their conversation.  “We’re going to be late!”

“Coming!”  Liam made his way to his nephew as Emma followed.

“Where are you guys going?” she asked.

“We’re going to the movies with Robin and Roland.  It’s Dollar Kid’s Night and they’re showing the latest _Ice Age_.  Then burgers at home followed by story-time in Castle Jones.”  When Brady started spending time with his uncle, they would build a pillow fort in the living room of the Jones residence and every time Brady went over, he’d beg Liam to build the fort once again, dubbing it Castle Jones.

Emma knelt down at Brady’s level once again, pulling his knit beanie down on his head.

“Like always, be good for Uncle Liam, do what he says and don’t forget to brush your teeth before bedtime.  Got it Peanut?”

“Yes Mama.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too!”  Brady grabbed Liam’s hand and practically dragged him out the door and down the stairs.  Outside, Robin and Roland were waiting in Robin’s green and white _Storybrooke Forestry Department_ truck.

“BRADY!”

“ROLAND!”  Both boys waved enthusiastically at each other.  Liam took Brady’s backpack and put it in the back of the truck and hoisted Brady into the extra car seat.  When he was done, Liam took his seat up front next to Robin.  Emma waved to her son as the truck pulled away and down the street.

After a few minutes, she went back inside to her apartment and pulled the three baby books her mother had made for Brady off the shelf, getting them ready for Killian’s perusal later that night.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian moved the bouquet of buttercups to his left hand so he could ring the bell for Emma’s place.  Emma was at the door quickly, smiling at him.

“Hey.”  Killian couldn’t speak; she may have been clad in a [simple pair of jeans and a flannel shirt](http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=209628455), but the way Emma was smiling at him in that moment took his breath away.  He was snapped out of his daydream when he felt Emma poke him in the shoulder.  “Where’d you go?”

“Uh…nowhere love, sorry.  Just zoned out is all”, he replied.  Killian quickly shoved the flowers into her hands.  “These are for you.”

Emma laughed and lifted them to her nose, taking in their uplifting scent.  Killian felt the tips of his ears warm up.

“I can’t believe you remembered.”

“How could I forget love?”  They stared at each other and Killian had to fight to break the moment.  “Yes, well…”

“Right!  Come on in.”  Emma waved him in and he followed her up the stairs to the apartment.  Killian smiled as he saw Brady’s toys strewn about in a corner of the living room when they walked in and his son’s coats hanging on the pegs of the coat rack next to the front door.  He hung his coat up and turned to see Emma bustling around the kitchen, filling a glass vase with water and then arranged the bouquet he’d brought her within it.

Killian crossed his arms and leaned against the counter to watch her.  She was still the most beautiful woman he’d ever come across.  No other he’d met while gone ever came close to being as good as her.  When she’d first rejected his proposal and then broke up with him, he thought he stopped loving her…at least it’s what he’d told himself.  It wasn’t until he had gone out on his first date with a woman from the office that he realized he still loved Emma Nolan and always would.

Then he returned to Storybrooke and found out the truth.  He was so angry, so very angry, but he couldn’t stop himself from just keeping it simmering just below the surface.  Killian didn’t want Emma to stop him from knowing his son and so he promised himself he wouldn’t say anything.  It would probably not end well, because Killian knew he’d explode at some point; he could practically feel it coming.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma finished arranging the flowers and was startled when she turned to see Killian watching her with what could only be described as dopey smile on his face.

“Sorry love, I didn’t mean to startle you.”  Emma noticed a very faint flush to his cheeks.

“No, it’s…you’re good.  I mean…it’s cool.”  She walked around him and over to the breakfast nook where she placed the flowers in the middle of the table.  “Thanks again Killian…for the flowers.”

“It’s no problem Emma.”  They descended into an awkward silence.

“Right!  Um…let me grab the baby books and you can look through them while dinner arrives.”  She practically ran from him and out to the living room where she’d left the baby books.  Emma pulled them into her arms and took a deep breath as she heard Killian step into the living room behind her.

“You alright?”

“Yeah…just nervous.”  Emma signaled over to the couch with a nod of her head and sat down with Killian taking the spot next to her.

“Why would you be?”

“I just want you to be okay with how Brady was raised; to make you think I did alright.”

“I’m pretty sure you’ve done fine.  The lad is happy and healthy and loved by everyone who knows him.”  Emma gave a small laugh.

“That is so true.”  She placed the first book in Killian’s lap, “My mom started this one when I told them I was pregnant.  It even has my first sonograms in it.”

Killian flipped the front cover open and she was happy when he smiled immediately when he saw the grainy black and white photograph taped to the first page.  He ran his finger over the picture as he read the handwritten caption next to it:

**_Baby Nolan-Jones_ **

**_4 months_ **

Emma heard his breath hitch as he read the caption.

“Even then?” he asked.

“Of course.”  Killian hummed in response and continued to silently flip pages.  There were pictures of Emma standing next to a whiteboard showing the growth of her belly every month and what size Brady would have been at the time.  When they got to the page showing her a couple weeks before giving birth, she laughed.  “God…I look like a huge whale.”

“Nonsense Swan, you look beautiful. You were carrying my child.”  Emma started and stood from the couch, wrapping her arms around herself.  “Swan, I…”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Call you what?  ‘Swan’?”  She heard him put the book the book on the coffee table and walk over to her so she tried moving out of his reach.  But she was unsuccessful when she felt his hand on her shoulder.  “Why should I not?  You’re Swan… _my_ Swan.”

Emma twisted her shoulder away.

“Please don’t.”  She felt her eyes begin to water and wiped a loan tear away.  Before Killian could say anything else, there was a knock at the door.  Emma took advantage of the reprieve and answered the door, accepting the Chinese delivery.  She thanked and paid, and the man left, oblivious to the tension in the apartment.

Emma took the bag of food to the table in the nook and started laying everything out.  She could feel Killian’s eyes boring into the back of her head and it made her eyes tear up even more and suddenly Emma felt them running down her cheeks as she sniffled.

“Oh Emma…” Next thing Emma knew, Killian’s arms were around her.  She turned in his arms, resting her cheek on his shoulder and cried.  “Let it out love.”

He led over to the couch where they sat, with his arms around her as she cried.

“I’m so sorry.  I was so mad at myself for what I did.  But my walls…the assholes wouldn’t shut up.  A small part of them kept whispering that you weren’t going to want me anymore--”  Killian leaned back from her, placing his hands on her cheeks and leaning his forehead against hers.

“You understand one thing right now Emma Ruth Nolan:  I would have _never_ and will never not want you.  I was in it for the long haul since we met.”

“Killian...”  She pulled away and wiped her cheeks, standing and starting to pace.  “We were 18.  We weren’t ready to be parents and no matter what you think, I just know you would have come to resent the whole thing when you were studying and the baby would be crying all night and--”

“We’ve been through this!”  Killian stood with his hands clenched in anger.  “Do not _ever_ imply that I would have resented my son.  _Ever_.”

“I didn’t mean you would’ve resented _him_!”  Emma cried, “I know you would’ve probably grown to hate me for it at some point.”

“Emma, I _proposed_ to you!  I wanted to marry you!”  Her heart clenched when he used the past tense.

“But that doesn’t mean you wanted to have kids so early!”

Killian pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled sharply.

“I need to know something and don’t lie to me.  Because Emma…you can lie to everyone else, even yourself, but you can’t lie to me.  You never could.”

“What is it?”

“Were you going to tell me about him?  Ever?”  Killian looked over at her.  “If Liam hadn’t found out, would you have told me about him?”

He was right: she couldn’t lie to him.  Not when it was about something that mattered.  She took a deep breath, wiping more tears away.

“Eventually.”

“E-are you joking?”  His voice was so quiet and measured that it scared her.  “ _Eventually_?  What does that mean?  When he was 18 and chose to do it himself?  In the next couple of years when he started asking why he didn’t have a papa like all the other kids?  _When_ Emma?”

“I-I don’t know.”  They stared at each other.  “He was going to know the truth.  I was going to explain everything; that it wasn’t your fault you weren’t around, but mine.”

“Did you not think that I had a right to know I was going to be a father?  It’s not so much the fact that you lied about why you left me, it’s the fact that you took AWAY MY CHOICE EMMA!”

Emma just dropped onto the couch and cried some more.  He was right, whether he resented them or not, whether he chose to go to California with her and the baby or not…she’d taken the choice from him.  Emma didn’t blame him if he never forgave her.

After a while, her tears stopped and she felt him sit down next to her.  He leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees, resting his head in his hands.

“If you hate me so much, if you’re so angry with me…why do you still call me Swan?” she asked quietly.  Killian scoffed.

“I don’t hate you, but don’t pretend I’m not allowed to be angry.”

“I know.”

“But Emma…”  She felt his hand take hers and he intertwined their fingers.  “From the moment we met, you were it for me.  There was never going to be anyone but you.  I said it before, you’re my Swan.” 

Emma turned to face him and moved forward, placing her forehead against his.  She reached up and cupped his cheek, tracing her fingers through his dark scruff.

“I’m so sorry.  I know you might not ever truly forgive me, but I need you to know something:  I never stopped loving you Killian. Never.”  She heard his sharp intake of breath.

“There wasn’t a day went by that I didn’t think of you.  I love you Emma, always have and I always will.”

They both leaned forward, closing the space between them, letting their lips touch.  It was as if no time had gone by, and they were kids again.  Kissing Killian Jones had been one of her favorite pastimes then…and it could be again.

But in the back of her mind, a little voice reminded her of something: _His job is in Seattle.  He’s going to have to go back eventually.  After everything you’ve done, what makes you think he’s going to want to stay?_

~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian was still apprehensive.  It wouldn’t be easy.  He loved Emma more than anything, except for maybe his son, but that love only went so far.  She’d lied to him, she had kept his son from him, and when she admitted that she would have _eventually_ told him about Brady…it hurt.

Yes, he loved her…but could he trust her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I managed to write this out because the library I work out had no internet for a whole day and when I'm at the front desk, the internet is a lifeline...so I spent quite a bit of time writing. I hope you enjoyed it...let me know.


	9. Kisses, Fights, and the Flu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Brady gets sick and Killian learns a new truth, will it threaten the happiness Emma & Killian have?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! Now that school is done, I can focus more on writing and so the wait between chapters shouldn't be all that long. Thanks for being patient with the wait while I finished school stuff. I'm thinking of more stuff to write for y'all...so without further ado, enjoy Chapter 9!

**July 2016**

They weren’t together.  Not officially anyways.  They agreed to it in fact and decided that after everything, they needed to be cautious.  Emma wanted him in her and Brady’s lives, but there was that thought in the back of her mind, always reminding her that he was going to eventually have to leave.  His eventual departure was stopping her from giving her all in this second attempt.

But she still tried…even if it was just a little.

It was a few days after their dinner date, and they were on her couch making out like they used to when they were kids.  When air became a necessity, Emma sat up and away from Killian, who chased after her lips with his own.

“Is everything okay love?”

“What are we doing Killian?”  He gave her the most sinful smirk as he chuckled lightly.

“I was getting reacquainted with your kisses darling…”

“You know what I mean Killian.”  She tried giving him a look that meant business as she scooted off his lap towards one end of the couch while he sat up straight.

“I thought we were trying again.  Slowly of course, because there is much to deal with on both sides, but still trying.”

“But…”  It was on the tip of her tongue to mention his job, but the hope and adoration in his eyes stopped her.

“But what?”

“Nothing.  It’s not important.”

“Emma--”  Before he could get her to talk, there was a knock on the door leading down to the shop and her cellphone rang.

“Emma!  It’s Elsa!  I need your help down here, like now!”

“I’ll be right there!”  Emma grabbed her cellphone from the coffee table.  “Damn, it’s Brady’s daycare.”

“What?” Killian asked anxiously.  She waved him off as she answered.

“Hello?”

_“Miss Emma Swan?”_

“This is she.”

_“Your son, Brady, needs to be picked up. He’s running a fever.  We’ve had a little girl come in with a cold the other day and she seems to have passed it to the others.”_

“He’ll be picked up as soon as possible.”  She hung up the phone as another knock sounded at her door.

“Emma!” Elsa’s impatient voice called.

“I’ll be right there!”  Emma got up and she heard Killian follow.

“What’s wrong Swan?  Is Brady okay?”

“One of the kids at daycare was sick and passed it on to some others in class…including Brady.”  Emma pulled her hair into a ponytail and went to put on her shoes.  “Elsa needs me downstairs, so would you mind going to get him for me please?  I know he’d love to see his papa.”

“Of course darling.”  Killian got ready and followed Emma downstairs to the shop.  They parted ways with a kiss at the back door and Emma smiled as she watched Killian hurry down the street.

Maybe this _could_ work after all.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian rushed into the front office of Brady’s daycare and was surprised to find someone he didn’t recognize sitting at the front desk.

“Hello, I’m Jasmine.  How may I help you sir?” the woman asked.

“Yes…hi.  I’m here to pick up Brady Nolan-Jones, we got a call a little while ago telling us he had a fever.”

“And you are?”

“Killian Jones.  I should be on the list of approved people, I’m his father.”  The woman started typing and then frowned at the screen.

“I’m sorry sir, but your name is not on the approved list or parent/guardian list.”

“I’ve picked him up countless times.  Please, just let me get him home, he’s sick.”

“I’m sorry Mr. Jones, but unless Brady’s mother adds you, I cannot allow you to take him from the premises.  She or David and Mary Margaret Nolan are the only ones allowed to do so.”

“I can’t believe this…”  Killian pushed away from the counter and walked outside, where he paced for a few minutes before calling David.

_“Hello?”_

“Hi Dave, it’s Killian.”

_“Hey, what can I do for you?”_

“I’m in a bit of a pickle.  The daycare called and said my son is sick, but I’m not on the list of people allowed to take him home.”

_“What?  Why isn’t Anna letting you take him?”_

“Anna’s not there today.  It’s some woman named Jasmine…and Emma never put me on the list as Brady’s father.”

 _“Damn. I’ll be there in 10.”_   Killian stayed outside while he waited for David.  He was angry…and disappointed.  Emma told him she would be taking the steps to make it official in the eyes of the courts that he was legally (and biologically, obviously) Brady’s father.

He was telling his head and heart how stupid he’d been to trust her once more…to trust that she would be truthful with him and not run (even if it wasn’t literal) and not hold things back when David’s police cruiser pulled up.

The man in question got out and jogged up to where Killian stood.

“I know that look Killian”, he said as they walked into the building.

“There’s no look Dave.”

“Just don’t be angry with her.”  Killian pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed with exasperation.

“Dave…I mean this with the utmost respect for you:  You have _no_ right to tell me how to feel about _any_ of this.  You have _no idea_ what I’m feeling…so please do _not_ lecture me about it.”

David, most likely realizing that Killian was right, raised his hands in deference and went to speak to Jasmine.  He showed her his ID and she led him to the infirmary, as Killian watched in barely concealed jealousy.

David exited with Brady’s _Jake_ backpack slung over one shoulder and the boy in question in his arms.  Killian could see his son’s eyes slightly open and noticed the second he saw him.

“Papa!”  Killian’s heart broke slightly at the sound of his son’s weak voice.

“My boy.”  He took Brady from David’s arms and kissed his forehead, surprised at how hot it felt.  “How are you feeling?”

“Horrible Papa.  I wanna go home.”

“Of course.  Grandpa is going to drive us.”  Brady curled tighter into Killian’s shoulder as they stood off to the side and waited for David to finish signing him out.

Except for Brady’s light snores, the drive back to the tea shop was completely silent.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma breathed a sigh of relief as the busy crowd that had arrived as they got the call about Brady finally dispersed.

“Elsa, I’m going upstairs to check on Brady.”  Emma started backing away to the stairs to take her to the apartment as Elsa stuck her head out of the kitchen.

“You’re good.  It’s pretty slow now and Alyssa comes in an hour, so I’ll be fine.”  She waved Emma off and Emma jogged up the stairs.  Entering her apartment, she found her father sitting at the kitchen table.

“Hey princess.”  David stood and kissed her temple.

“Hey dad.  How is he?”

“High fever and chills.  There’s really nothing other than some fever reducer we could give him, which he’s taken, so he’s sleeping now.  He’ll be fine in a day or so…he’s a strong kid.”

“Where’s Killian?”  Emma saw the change in her father’s face, “Dad…where is he?  What’s wrong?  Why are you even here?”

“Anna wasn’t the one at work today”, David replied with a sigh, “It was a new person, Jasmine.”

“So?”

“She doesn’t know Killian, and because his name wasn’t on the approved list, she wouldn’t allow him to take Brady.”  The look on her father’s face says it all.

“Oh God…”  Emma drops her head into her hand.

“Yeah.  Needless to say, he’s pretty pissed.”

“I bet”, Emma scoffs.

“Why didn’t you add his name?”

“Honestly?  I forgot.”  Emma takes a seat at the kitchen table with her father.  “I had plans to do it…that and update Brady’s birth certificate and all the other official crap…”

“But…”

“I forgot, like I said.”  Because the both of them were enthralled in the conversation, neither heard Killian emerge from Brady’s room.

“I told you once, Swan, on what was the _worst_ day of my life: you may be able to spot a liar, but you are horrible at being one.”

David cleared his throat to break the awkward silence that followed and stood from the table.

“I’ll just go and see you guys later?”

“Bye Dad.”

“See you Dave.”

They were quiet until they heard David’s police cruiser pull away.

“I’m not lying…not entirely.  I really did forget.”  Emma kept her eyes on the table in front of her.  She heard Killian sigh and then the scrape of the chair being pulled away.

“Emma.”

She kept her eyes on a scratch in the table.

“Emma, love, please look at me.”  She almost didn’t, she didn’t want him to see beginnings of tears in her eyes…but she fought them back and looked up at him.  “Why?  I need to know.”

She had no idea where it came from, but suddenly Emma felt angry.  Angry at him for leaving eventually and angry for him reminding her how much she loved him.

“You’re asking me why?  How about you answer a question for _me_ first Killian:  Why are you still here?  Don’t you have a job to go back to?  All the way across the country?  You probably have some glamorous woman waiting for you once you’ve finished with me here.”  Killian jumped from his chair, fists clenched in anger.

“How could you say something like that to me?  I love _you_ , I’ve only ever loved you.  Since I was a wee lad you, Emma Nolan, have been the only woman for me.  Even after you broke my heart, even after you didn’t tell me I had a son…I _still_ love you.”

“Uh huh…”  Emma scoffed.

“Emma…”

“After _everything_ I’ve done to you, you should hate me.”

“ _Never_ , Emma, I will never hate you.”  At that, Emma tried to stealthily wipe her eyes.

“You haven’t answered my question:  Why are you still here?”

“I’m still here because I want to know my son and for you.”

“You have a job Killian, a life to get back to.”  Killian pulled her up from her chair and took her face in his hands, leaning his forehead against hers.

“My life has had no meaning without you these past five years and every moment I’m not with Brady, it’s like there’s no light in my life.  I cannot leave him, or you.  I refuse to.”

Emma pushed away from him slightly and searched his eyes.

“What are you saying Killian?”

“I quit my job.  Last month.”

“ _What?_   How could you do something like that?  Killian--”

“Silver wanted me back and I couldn’t--”  He ran his hands through his hair and down his face.  “I couldn’t leave you or Brady, so I quit.  Smee has been sending out resumes for me, and I’ve had a few bites.  I’m actually waiting on my second interview with Nautilus Ships.  The owner has been trying to get me to work for him ever since I graduated.  Mr. Dakkar, or Captain Nemo, as some call him, has always been a better man than Silver.  He has this fatherly demeanor that I’ve missed since the passing of my parents.”

“Why didn’t you go with him in the first place?  If he’s nicer and a better boss?”

“Nautilus offices are in Manhattan.  I was so hurt, so filled with anger that I didn’t want to be anywhere near this side of the country because I knew I’d come up here the second I had any kind of downtime.  I would have driven the eight and a half hours just to see you.”

Before either of them could say anything more, they were interrupted by the squeaking of a bedroom door and the patter of small feet.

“Mama?  Papa?”  Emma felt a pang of sadness in her chest at the sight of her little boy all sick, dragging his beloved Captain Hook behind him and rubbing his eyes.  She walked over and knelt in front of him, putting a hand up to his forehead.

“Hey Peanut.  How are you feeling?”

“Not good Mama.  I feel all chilly and my whole body hurts.”

“That’s why we need to get you into bed my boy”, said Killian.  “You have to go back to your nap so you’ll feel better.”

“You two woke me up.”  Brady pulled Hook into his arms and looked over his head at his parents.  “Why are you mad?”

“We’re not mad baby.”

“But…”

“Your mama is right lad, we’re not.  We were just worried about how sick you were.”

“But I heard her say you have to go.  Are you going to leave us Papa?”  Emma saw the look on Killian’s face and knew he probably felt his heart break in two at the look on his son’s face.  He knelt down to Brady’s level.

“I swear to you Brady, that I will never leave you or your mother and not come back.  I might have to go do work things once in a while, when I get a better job, but maybe you could come with me a few times.”

At hearing of the possibility of traveling with his Papa, Emma saw color return to Brady’s cheeks and a big smile break out over his face.

“Really Papa?”

“Yes sir.”  Brady launched himself at Killian in a big hug.  He stood with his son in his arms and started walking back to his bedroom.  “However, we need to get you feeling better first.”

Emma hung back in the hallway outside Brady’s room while Killian tucked him in.

“Can we go visit Neverland Papa?”

“One day.  We’ll go to Neverland and Tomorrowland and even…the Magic Kingdom.  Would you like that?”

“Yes!”

“Now be a good pirate and go back to sleep.  Hold on to Hook and get some rest…and I promise, once you’re better, we’ll go for cupcakes at Miss Ingrid’s shop.”

“Yes Papa.”  Brady scooted down into his bed and held Hook tight in his arms.  Emma smiled as Killian kiss his forehead and tucked the sheets around him.

“Sleep well my boy.”  Killian walked back out to the hallway and Emma was shutting the door and leaving it open a crack, when Brady spoke once more.

“Papa?”  Killian smiled at her before he stuck his head back in the room.

“Yes son?”

“I love you forever.”

“Aye my boy…I love you forever too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. There's just a few more left, at most. As always, don't hesitate to follow me on twitter: @blackwidownat4 for updates on writing or for just my weirdness.


	10. Strawberries & Heartbreak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things were good...then they were very not good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry...please don't kill me.

[Emma, Killian, & Brady](http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=213992762)

* * *

 

Brady wouldn’t allow Killian to leave while he was sick.  Each night Killian would say he needed to get back to Uncle Liam’s, Brady would throw a fit of epic proportions, despite how sick he was.

So Killian stayed and watched over him during the day while Emma worked.  Over the three days Killian watched over his son, he realized how much he still had to learn about him.  Four year olds ( _“Almost five Papa.  I’ll be five in three whole months!”_ ) had quite the amount of favorites, whether it was colors or cartoons or animals or superheroes or what have you, and they had a list of dislikes.

Point was, Killian was still learning.

A week after Brady’s full recovery, Killian had finally been allowed home to Liam’s.  He was updating his design portfolio to send to Nautilus at Nemo’s request, when there was a knock at the front door.  Killian stood from the kitchen table and went to answer the door, surprised to find his son standing there with a big grin on his face.

“Papa!”  Brady jumped into his father’s arms.

“Hey sailor.  Where’s your mum?” Killian asked as he leaned back from Brady’s embrace.  He looked up immediately when he heard running footsteps on the sidewalk.

“Brady Flynn Nolan-Jones…how many times have I told you to not run off without me?”

Brady ducked his head and grimaced.

“I’m sorry Mama.  I just wanted to see Papa.”

“That’s all well and good my boy”, said Killian, “But you need to stick to your mum.  It’s not safe for four year olds to run away from their mummy.”

“I’m almost _five_ Papa”, Brady indignantly replied.  Killian smiled as he heard Emma’s laugh and looked up to see her slightly roll her eyes with an amused smirk on her face.

“Of course, I’d almost forgotten!”  Killian stood as Brady slid out of his arms.  “What brings my favorite two people to see me today?”

“Well, your son has something he wants to ask you, and I have something that I meant to give you a long time ago before I realized I had no idea how to find you”, said Emma.  That’s when Killian noticed she was holding a small, shoddily wrapped package in her hands; it looked like it was wrapped with remnants of all the wrapping paper Emma had had in her closet.  “The wrapping is courtesy of the Peanut.”

Brady looked up at him with pride in his little smile, and his little chest puffed out in satisfaction at his work.

“It is most certainly the best wrapped present I have ever received.”

“Yay!”  Brady jumped up and down with exhilaration.  Killian stuck a finger under a piece of loose wrapping and was about to tear it open when Emma stopped him.

“Open it later?”  Killian gave her a puzzling look.  “Trust me.  There’s a letter in there explaining everything.”

He realized the emphasis she’d placed on the word ‘everything’ and was looking forward to seeing what was inside.

“Well, what is it that you’ve to ask me Brady?”

His son looked back at Emma, who gave him an encouraging smile.  Brady turned back to Killian and drew a breath.

“Papa, I’m better now.  I’m not sick.”

“I know that and I’m very glad.”

“You promised me.”

“What did I promise you?”

“Cupcakes at Miss Ingrid’s!”

Killian laughed and smacked himself in the forehead, acting like he’d actually forgotten.

“Of course!  How could I have forgotten!”  Brady laughed and Killian couldn’t help thinking how lucky he was to have his son in his life.  “Well, let me get some shoes on and we’ll go.” 

Brady followed him to his bedroom where he sat on the bed while Killian dug around the closet for some sneakers.  When he’d found the pair he was looking for, Killian took a seat next to his son and tied them on.

“We have the same shoes Papa!”  Brady smiled and wiggled black high-top Converse covered feet at him.

“That we do my boy.  I guess great minds think alike.”

They returned downstairs to find that Emma had wandered into the living room where Killian’s design portfolio was open on his laptop, along with the email from Nemo that basically welcomed him to the company.

“You got the job?” she asked in a quiet voice.

“Unofficially.  I just need to send my portfolio in before it’s official.”

“They’re in Manhattan.”

“Yes, but Swan…”

“Forget about it.”  Emma cut him off and he could tell she was hurt.  She must think he would be leaving them to move to the city, even after he told her he would never leave them again.  Killian knew Emma well enough not to push it, so he told himself he’d try to talk to her later.  He tried to suppress the look of hurt on his face so that she wouldn’t see how her distrust wounded him.

What would it take for her to trust him?  Besides, if anyone needed to learn trust again, it was him.  _She_ left _him_.  _She_ lied to _him_.  Killian was knocked out of his daydream by Brady tugging on the hem of his blue shirt.

“Can we go Papa?”

“Of course lad.  Of course.”  Deciding to put his hurt at Emma’s continued distrust aside, Killian smiled at his son and took his hand as they stepped outside to the yellow Bug for the drive to Ingrid’s.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian jumped out of the Bug and swung the seat back to unstrap Brady from his car seat once Emma pulled up in front of the bakery and his son wasted no time in pulling him into the store.

Brady was shuffling back and forth in front of Ingrid’s grand display case when Emma came in and stood next to him.  Before she could say anything he stopped her.

“I don’t want to fight today.  I want to spend time with my son.”  Killian stepped away and knelt down next to Brady.

“Papa!  Can I have two cupcakes?!”

“Not today son.  You can have one.”  Killian smiled as he saw Brady’s pout, exactly like his own at his age (based on all the pictures he’d seen).

“But…”

“One today, and maybe we’ll ask Miss Ingrid to make you a special _Jake and the Neverland Pirates_ cake for your birthday in a few months, aye?”

“Okay!”

“Now go choose.”

Brady stuck his little tongue out of the side of his mouth and tapped the glass.

“That one please Miss Ingrid!”

“You have great taste little man.  One Chocolate/Peanut Butter Torte for the gentleman.”  Ingrid leaned over the counter and handed the small, ice blue cardboard box to Brady.  When she stood, she looked over at Emma and Killian.  “How about you two?”

“I’ll take a Jammie Dodger Cupcake and Emma would like your Snickerdoodle one.” 

Killian didn’t have to look at Emma to know she was rolling her eyes at him.

“Ah, it seems you two haven’t changed all that much, have you?” asked Ingrid as she passed over their respective boxes and some forks with napkins.  “Same flavors you used to get back in high school.”

“I’d like to think that’s not true Miss Vinter, I’ve changed quite a bit.  For example, I’m not as naïve as I used to be”, answered Killian.

Before Ingrid could say anything, Emma grabbed his arm and started pulling him away.

“Thanks Ingrid!  We’re going to sit outside.  Brady, come on.”

Brady followed his parents outside where Killian helped him up into one of the plastic picnic chairs set around the tables and then took a seat next to him.  Killian watched as Brady carefully unboxed his cupcake and removed the wrapper and he did the same to his Jammie Dodger cake.

“Killian, may I speak with you please?”  He looked up to see Emma eyeing him with her arms crossed and tapping the toe of her black Vans.

“Of course, _love_.”  He turned to Brady, who was happily munching on his cupcake.  “We’ll be right over here lad.”

“Uh huh.”  Brady was too preoccupied to notice that his parents were mad at each other.

Killian gave his Jammie Dodger a longing look before he stood and walked over to where Emma waited.

“What?” he asked her with an exasperated sigh.

“What the hell was that?”

“What was what?”

“Inside Ingrid’s?  About not being naïve.”

“It was nothing.  I told you I don’t want to fight.”

“You’re the one who started throwing remarks around.”  He scoffed incredulously.

“Are you kidding me?  You started this when you wouldn’t hear me out earlier.”

Neither one noticed that Brady had finished his cupcake and was eyeballing Killian’s cupcake next to him.

“Why should I hear you out?  You’ve made it pretty clear Killian, you’re going to just leave again.”

Brady looked over at his parents and made sure they weren’t looking, then stuck his fork into the frosting of Killian’s cupcake and scooped a heaping bit of frosting into his mouth.

“How _dare_ you.  I never wanted to leave, that was all you.  _You_ left me and you lied to me.  I have loved you, Emma Swan, since practically the day we met and I would never leave you willingly.”  Emma scoffed.

“Please…”

Brady started scratching at his throat and taking deep breaths, wanting to call out to his parents but couldn’t.  He smacked the table and they both turned around to look at him.

“What’s wrong lad?”

Emma immediately looked over at Killian’s cupcake and saw the missing icing.

“Killian, there’s strawberries in that icing.”

“And?” he asked rushing over to his son.

“Brady is severely allergic to them!  He’s probably going into anaphylactic shock!”  Killian scooped him up, “Get in the car and call the hospital on the way.  I don’t have an epi-pen.”

“Bloody hell!”

They both rushed to the car and Emma took off, tires squealing.

 

Emma pulled into the ambulance bay of Storybrooke General almost five minutes later (small town…and she sped), where they were met by Doctor Whale and David.

“What happened?” David asked as Killian lay Brady on a gurney Whale had brought out.  Emma didn’t answer as they all filed into the emergency room and Brady was taken behind a curtain to be worked on.  “Emma!”

“What, Dad?”

“What happened?”  Killian was staring at his boy laying on a gurney, as Whale tried to insert a tube to help him breath.

“That idiot let him have strawberries!”  Killian spun around to face her.

“I didn’t _let_ him do anything!”

“You know he’s not supposed to have them!  They can kill him Killian!”

“I didn’t know anything!  No one told me a thing!”

“I’m sure.  Liam knows he’s allergic, he said he’d tell you.”

“Well he didn’t!” cried Killian.  “It never came up!”

“This is all your fault!  He could have died because of you!”

“I am _not_ going to let you blame me for this Emma.  You need to calm down, and I’m going to see my son.”  Emma grabbed his arm to stop him, “Let me go Emma.”

“No.  You have no right to go in there.”

“I’m his father Emma.”

“Legally speaking, you’re nothing of his.  I don’t want you near this hospital.”

“Emma…”  David finally spoke up, “You can’t do that to him.”

“I can do whatever I want.  _I_ am his mother.  I’ve been there his entire life, and _he_ barely knows him.”

“THAT IS NOT MY FAULT!  YOU NEVER TOLD ME HE EXISTED AND YOU KEPT HIM FROM ME.  YOU WILL NOT DO THAT AGAIN.”

“Killian, please calm down.”  David laid a placating hand on Killian’s shoulder, who promptly shook it off.

“I will _not_.  God help me Emma…he is my son too and I have every right towards him.  I don’t want to, but I _will_ get a lawyer if I have to.”

Emma looked as if she’d been slapped in the face.

“Get.  Out.”

“Just so we’re clear, this isn’t me leaving, this is you pushing me away.”  Killian turned to David.  "Please keep me informed."  He went towards the curtain where Brady lay and he could see Emma go to stop him but was held back by David.

"Emma..."

Killian stepped inside the curtain and up to Brady, who lay still, having been put under so the antihistamines could do their work.  Killian ran his hand through Brady's hair, pushing a lock of it away from his forehead.  He was thankful for this time with him before he went to Manhattan next week, something he had planned on telling Brady and Emma that night and then ask them to come with him.  That would no longer be happening and it was killing him.  He leaned forward and placed a kiss on Brady's forehead.

"I love you so much, my boy.  Don't worry, I _will_ be back...I swear to you."

He kissed Brady's forehead again and walked out without giving Emma or David another look.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will hideaway to work on the next chappie to avoid y'all throwing stuff at me.
> 
> As always, please don't hesitate to hit me up on Tumblr (blackwidownat2814) or Twitter (@blackwidownat4).


	11. Time In a Bottle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little time jump...we see how everyone is doing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To start...this guy is a bit of a filler chapter. I wanted to get something out to you guys. I know last time that the crap hit the fan, but one has to remember that life isn't perfect and things happen. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and I'll get to work on the next.

**Six weeks later- September 2016, Manhattan**

He hated the city. 

Well…that wasn’t entirely correct.  He just hated being there away from his son.  When Liam had come to visit a few weeks previous, he brought papers from Emma for Killian to sign so that he would be officially and legally recognized as Brady’s father in every single way.  He sent them back to her signed and with a single Post-It note affixed that said ‘Thank you’.

 _“You need to come home little brother.”_ Killian sighed into his cellphone.

“I know I do.  I don’t want to be here, away from Brady but my probationary time is almost up.  Just one more month…and it’s _younger_ brother.”  Liam chuckled on the other end of the phone call.

_“Of course.  Tell me…was it always going to be like this?  You getting this job and spending two months away?  Were you going to come back?”_

“Of course Liam!  I was never going to stay here.”

_“Did you tell her that?”_

“She wouldn’t let me.  I tried, but she just wouldn’t hear it…and then the whole thing with Brady.  What made me angry was that she felt that _she_ couldn’t trust _me_ , when it should be the other way around.”

_“I’ve seen her around.  She’s sorry, you know.”_

“Then let her tell me herself.”  They were both quiet for a second before Killian spoke again.  “Did you receive the video?”

_“Yes I did.  I’ll be seeing the little sailor tomorrow, so he’ll watch it then.”_

“Thank you brother.”

They hung up a few minutes later.  Killian dropped his phone on the couch of the suite at the Roosevelt that _Nautilus_ had put him up at and stepped out on the balcony, staring out at the city.

_I’ll be with you soon my boy._

~*~*~*~*~*~

**September 2016, Storybrooke**

“Uncle Liam!”  Emma watched as Liam crouched to catch Brady in his arms in a tight hug.

“How is my favorite nephew?” he asked.

“Awesome!”

Emma couldn’t help but smile at how happy Brady was to see his uncle.  It had been almost a month since Liam had come to see him after his allergy scare.

“Guess who I talked to yesterday?” Liam asked.

“Who, Uncle Liam?”

“Your Papa!”

“Really?!”

It killed Emma that Brady hadn’t been able to see him.  But it had been her fault and she lived with that every single day she saw the sadness in her son’s face.  As soon as she’d yelled those horrible things at Killian, she had wanted to take them back.  She had been so scared, seeing Brady that way, and faulted herself for not remembering to check if there was an Epi-Pen in the glove compartment of the Bug.  It’s what prompted her to go to see Peter Bell, Rose’s dad and Storybrooke’s only family lawyer, to ask him to draw up papers acknowledging Killian’s paternity.

~*~*~*~*~*~

**_August 2016_ **

_“Come in Emma!”  She stepped into Mr. Bell’s office and hugged the man in question.  Rose’s dad was a jovial person and always had a smile and a hug for everyone who came to see him.  Emma pulled away from the hug and they both took their respective seats.  “Now, getting down to business.  What makes you in need of my services?”_

_Emma flipped open the red file folder she’d brought with her and placed Brady’s birth certificate on his desk._

_“I need to officially fill in this slot”, she said as she pointed to the blank ‘FATHER’ space._

_“Okay.  What is the father’s full name?”_

_“Killian Brady Jones.”_

_Emma saw his eyes widen slightly when he heard the name.  For the first year or so, the town’s gossip mill had been running itself ragged trying to determine who Brady’s father was because Emma refused to outright discuss it with anyone.  After a while, people were so charmed by her little boy that they forgot to care._

_“I want to you to know that I mean nothing by this next question Emma, but it is one that I must ask.  Unofficially, I 100% believe you.”_

_“Of course.”_

_“Officially, I have to ask:  Are you sure Killian is Brady’s father?  There won’t be another man coming out of the woodwork to claim paternity?”_

_“No, sir.  I can assure you with 100% that Killian is his father.”_

_“Okay.”  Mr. Bell typed the information into his computer._

_“However…” Emma continued as she pulled out two baggies and placed them on the desk.  “If you want proof, I’ve got hair from both of them.”  Mr. Bell chuckled as he looked at the bags._

_“We don’t need that.  Like I said, I believe you.  Besides, I know them both and even the three blind Ivimey brothers that live over on Farmers Road can tell Killian is Brady’s father, that’s how much they look alike.”  Emma truly laughed for the first time in weeks._

_“Thank you Mr. Bell, I needed that.”_

_“Well, I_ am _here to help after all.”_

_Mr. Bell finished up the paperwork for Emma to sign and then put together the packet so that it could be sent to Killian to be signed by him.  She knew Liam was going to go visit him in the city in a few days, so she texted him on her way out of the office to meet her outside Granny’s for the hand-off._

~*~*~*~*~*~

**September 2016, Storybrooke**

“Momma!  Did you hear that?  Uncle Liam talked to Papa!”  Brady jumped up and down in front of her with a wide smile on his face.

“That’s awesome Peanut.”

“When can _I_ talk to Papa?”  It broke Emma’s heart to hear the sadness in her son’s voice when he asked.  She looked over to Liam who had a similar look to her own.

“I don’t know Peanut.  He’s very busy working…”  She almost cried when Brady ducked his head and started shuffling his little feet around.  After what happened, Emma never intended to keep Brady from his father.  She spent countless nights trying to make herself call Killian from her phone so she could just hand it to Brady.  She was 1000% sure Killian Jones would _never_ speak to her again…and he was quite right not to.

“Oh.  Okay then.”  Brady started to walk away to his room when Liam stopped him.

“Hey there, you didn’t let me finish.  I’ve got a surprise from your Papa for you.”  Brady’s little eyes widened.

“Really?!”

“Yes sir.”

“What is it?  Can I see it now?  Please Uncle Liam!  PLEASE?!”

“Of course, but I need to borrow your mummy’s computer.”  Liam looked up at Emma at the end of his statement.

“Sure. Brady can show you where it is.  I’ve got to finish a few things before I go.”  She smiled to herself as she watched her three and a half foot son practically drag his six foot uncle out of the kitchen and out to the living room where their computer was hooked up to the TV.

Emma heard Brady telling Liam how to turn everything on.  She watched from the kitchen as Liam clicked on Brady’s profile picture and was prompted for a password.

“What’s your password Mr. Brady?”

“My hero!”

“Ah!  I’m sure I know who that is”, Liam replied as he tapped in a password.  Unfortunately, he was wrong.

“What’d you type Uncle Liam?”

“Jake.”  Emma saw him give Brady a puzzled look.

“Jake isn’t my hero Uncle Liam.”

“Clearly.”  He sat staring at his nephew for a second.  “I think I’ve got it this time!”

Emma laughed quietly to herself as Liam’s new attempt at the password was rejected.

“How about this time?” asked Brady.

“I used ‘Hook’ this time.”

“Captain Hook isn’t my hero!”

“Then, pray tell, who is my dear nephew?”

“Papa!”

Emma’s hand flew to her mouth as she felt tears start to form in her eyes.  She was a horrible person for treating Killian the way she had.  None of this was his fault and she’d kept him from her little boy who saw him as his hero.

Liam successfully logged into Brady’s profile and Emma saw her son’s face light up when he saw his background image made up of pictures of him and Killian.  Liam said nothing and simply clicked into the internet and pulled up his email.  When he found the correct one, he opened and downloaded the attachment.

“What is it Uncle Liam?!”

“Your Papa made you a video.”

“I wanna see!  Please Uncle Liam!”

Liam clicked on the downloaded attachment and a video popped up on the screen, Killian’s smiling face looking back at them…and it made Emma’s heart hurt even more.  Liam clicked once more, and the video began:

_“Hey my boy!”_

“Hi Papa!”

“ _I miss you so much and I’m so sorry I’m not there with you right now.”_   Killian looked off camera and sniffled (and Emma kept dying just a little more).  _“I wanted you to be here with me, you and your mum, that was my plan.  I was going to surprise you both.  But then, you got sick and I had to go.  I swear I didn’t leave without saying goodbye.  I went to see you and you were asleep.”_

“Did he really Uncle Liam?”

“Of course lad, your Papa loves you very much.”  The video continued, but the scenery had changed: Killian was now in some park.

_“I thought that maybe getting out of my place would be a good idea.  This is Central Park Brady, and it has a zoo!”_

“A _zoo_ Papa?”

 _“Yes my boy, a zoo.  I know how much you love animals.  I promise to bring you here and we’ll spend the whole day seeing all the animals you want.”_ The video switched from Central Park to bustling Times Square.

“Momma!  Come see!” Emma wiped her eyes as Brady called to her and she went and sat next to him. 

 _“This is Times Square.  I’m here because I’m trying to decide what to buy you for your birthday.”_   The camera panned up to reveal the big blue sign that said THE DISNEY STORE.

“Momma!  Look!”

“I see Peanut.”

_“I know you well enough to say you’re probably bouncing around and showing your mummy.”_

“Yup!”  Killian walked inside the store and they heard him asking if it was okay to continue filming as he was making a video for his son.  Once he was given approval, he continued, wandering in to aisle with all things Peter Pan related.

_“I’m not going to show you what I’m going to get for you because that would ruin the surprise.  Suffice to say, I promise I’ll be there for your birthday.”_

Brady turned to Emma with an eager look on his face.

“Momma, can Papa come to my birthday party?  Please?”

Emma could never deny her son, or Killian.  She smiled at Brady and pushed away the hair covering his forehead (much like his father’s liked to do).

“Of course Peanut, he’s your Papa.”

 _“I miss you, so much.”_   When Emma looked up at the video, she just knew Killian was talking to her.  _“And I’m sorry.  I’m so, so sorry that everything got bungled up and I didn’t have a chance to explain it all to you.  I’ll be home soon, I can’t wait to see you.  I love you so much…both of you.”_

 


	12. The Turning of the Tide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was going to angst it up one last time, but decided against it. So here for you is a happy, hope filled chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to xhookswenchx for being my beta for this chapter since my bestie best Courtney is out of town right now. Thank you Cee!!!

**Mid-October 2016, Storybrooke**

_“I miss you so much.”_  She wiped her eyes with the sleeve of an oversized navy blue cable knit sweater.   _“And I’m sorry.  I’m so, so sorry that everything got bungled up and I didn’t have a chance to explain it all to you.  I’ll be home soon, I can’t wait to see you.  I love you so much…both of you.”_

After everything she did to him, how could he still love her?  How could he even muster up enough feeling in him to even _miss_ her?  If she’d only allowed him to explain that day, none of this would have happened.  Emma and Brady would be happy and with Killian in Manhattan, even if it was just a couple months.

She was the absolute worst person in the history of Killian Jones’ life.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma thought about getting a job in Hollywood, because by now, she was an excellent actress.  She was sure no one could tell how much everything was killing her inside.  She kept her emotions in check; when Brady was at daycare or with his grandparents or uncle, Emma would watch Killian’s video to their son over and over…and at night, she would quietly cry herself to sleep.

Emma was staring through whatever nonsense was playing on the television while Brady played with his pirate Legos on the floor in front of her when he spoke up.

“Momma?”  He was looking at her with slight apprehension, biting his lip and scratching behind his right ear, just like his father.

“Yes, Peanut?”  She tried to keep the emotion that that simple shared trait made her feel.

“Can I talk to Papa?  I miss him.”

“It’s not that I don’t want you to baby, it’s just that I know he’s busy at work a lot.”

“ _Please_ Momma?   _Please_?”  He was practically begging and she no longer had the strength to deny him.

“Sure Peanut.”  Emma grabbed her cellphone from the coffee table and dialed Killian’s number.  Her heart was in her throat after every ring and she was about to hang up, when he picked up.

 _“Swan?”_  He sounded happy and sad and hopeful all at the same time.   _“Swan, is something wrong?  Is Brady okay?”_  She finally snapped out of it and answered.

“Hi Killian.  Yeah, he’s fine.”

_“Then why the call?”_

“Brady wants to talk with you.  He misses you.  Are you okay to talk?”

_“Aye, of course.  I miss the lad like you wouldn’t believe.  He’s not the only one I…”_

“Let me hand you over to him.”  Emma practically threw the phone at her son, “Here you go Peanut, it’s Papa.”  

Brady took the phone and put it on speaker.

“Hi Papa!”

_“My boy, I’ve missed you!  How are you?  Are you being good for your mum?”_

“Of course Papa, I’m a good pirate…just like you taught me.”  Emma smiled at Killian’s laugh coming over the line; his warm chuckle always made her feel better.  “And I’ve been learning from Uncle Liam!”

_“Oh, and what have you been learning from my dear older brother?”_

“Irish, Papa.”

_“Oh really?”_

“Yup!” replied Brady, popping  the ‘P’ at the end.

_“Tell me.”_

“Is breá liom tú!”

 _“Tá grá agamsa duit fosta.”_  Emma smiled once more, remembering that what Brady said meant ‘I love you’ because when he’d come home from spending time with Liam, it was the first thing he’d told her.  She assumed that what Killian said had to be ‘I love you too’.

“I know what that means Papa!”

_“Good.  I’m glad Liam is teaching you well.  Now, tell me all about your birthday party…how’s the planning going?”_

“Miss Ingrid is going to make my cake, just like you said.  She’s going to make me a pirate and there’s going to be a pirate ship and it will look just like the Jolly Roger and you’re going to be on it like a pirate too and Momma’s going to be on it and she’s going to be a princess.”

_“Is she really?”_

“Sea, i ndáiríre!” (Yes, really!)

_“Maith buachaill! Tá tú ag déanamh go han-mhaith.”_

“I didn’t understand the end of that Papa.”

_“I said you’re doing very well.”_

“Oh, okay.  Papa?”

_“Sea, mo buachaill?” (Yes, my boy?)_

“I have to potty.”  Killian laughed again.

_“Then go lad.  I’ll talk to your mother while you’re gone.  Don’t forget to wash your hands.”_

“Yes Papa!”  Brady handed the phone to Emma, who’d become filled with dread.  She didn’t speak for what felt like several minutes.

_“Emma?  Are you there?”_

“Oh…uh, yeah.  Sorry.”

_“It’s alright love.”_

“No, I mean…I’m _sorry_.  This entire thing is my fault and I should’ve let you explain earlier that day.”

_“I was going to ask you and Brady to come and stay with me while I was here…as a family.  I didn’t want to be apart from either of you.”_

Emma sighed as she felt the tears prickling at the back of her eyes.

“But I was an idiot and let my anger and hurt get in the middle of anything.”

_“Swan…”_

“Don’t…please don’t call me that.  I don’t deserve to hear that from you anymore.”

_“Emma, please…”_

“I know you’re angry with me, and I hope the papers made you happy, but this…this can’t happen Killian.”

 _“Why?  Why in the bloody hell not Emma?”_  She heard him groan and Emma knew him well enough to know he was probably pinching the bridge of his nose before he sighed and continued. _“I hated everything you did, lying to me and breaking my heart and keeping my son from me…and I wanted to be angry with you forever, but I can’t.  I just can’t do that anymore Emma.  You and our son make my life complete, as cliché as that sounds, but you do.  Five years of loneliness…that’s what California was like.  I saw Liam over Skype conversations more than I saw him in person.  Being around you and the lad…you’ve brought light back into my life.”_

“Killian…”

_“I understand if you don’t want to be with me because you no longer love me or whatever in the bloody hell you want to think…”_

“Killian…”

 _“No, I’m not done, so don’t interrupt me.”_  Emma sighed but didn’t say anything.   _“I have loved you since the moment I met you…and I’ve never stopped, no matter what.  And like I said, I understand if you no longer love me…but I will be returning to Storybrooke and we will be sharing custody of our son.  Children have been raised amicably for years, with parents not even having to be friends, but I think we can be.”_

Emma felt her heart break.  He loved her, but she’d ruined any chance of him wanting to be with her ever again.   _She’d_ done that and she was going to have to live with it for the rest of her life.

“Of course, Killian.  We can be friends…because that’s what you want.”

_“Do you promise me?  You won’t just change your mind and cut me out again?”_

“Yes, I promise.”  Emma heard the toilet flush and the water run, letting her know Brady was done in the bathroom.  “Brady will be back in a second.  Before I hand you off, do you remember the small gift I gave you?  That day?”

_“Of course.”_

“Have you looked at it?”

_“No.  To be honest, I’d completely forgotten about it.”_

“I need you to look at it.  I think you’ll like what’s on it.  Please?”

 _“Sure Emma.”_  She was brought to attention by little feet running towards her.

“Momma!  I’m back!  Can I talk to Papa now?”

“Of course, Peanut.  Let me just say bye, okay?”  Brady nodded.  “It’s your son’s turn again and if I don’t pass you over, you know how he’ll get.”

_“I understand.”_

“Bye Killian.”

 _“Bye Emma.”_  Emma handed the phone to Brady quickly, letting him know she’d be in her bedroom.

“Thanks Momma!”

Emma hurried to her room and shut the door, leaning her back against it and sliding to the floor in tears.

~*~*~*~*~*~

**Two weeks later, Manhattan**

He didn’t mean to put off taking a look at what Emma asked him to.  Nemo had asked several of the designers of his Nautilus crew to design a new ship for their tour line and the best design would be chosen and then put into production.

Killian wanted to get this more than anything because he could use the bonus to start putting away for his son’s future.  It wasn’t just him in this life anymore, he had someone else to take care of and that depended on him.  He wanted to make sure Brady never wanted for anything.

He made the final touches on his ship design: Killian had envisioned a modern yacht on the inside with an old pirate ship outside.  Passengers would have the modern amenities they required while still having somewhat of an old-world experience.  Once he’d sent off his design from his computer in his cubicle at Nautilus, he pulled on his black pea coat and beanie and went back to his place.

As he settled down to have his dinner, the shoddily wrapped package Emma had given him that day came to the forefront of his mind.  Killian let his dinner sit and dug around his suitcase for it.  He unwrapped it, saving the (mostly) _Jake and the Neverland Pirates_ wrapping paper he knew was his son’s favorite.

Inside was a short, scribbled letter with a small, red flash drive taped to it.  Killian removed the drive and plugged it into his tablet, which he propped up on the table next to his dinner.  The documents folder popped up, showing the drive labeled as BRADY JONES.  He double clicked, opening the drive and there was just one file on it: a little yellow folder titled BRADY.

Before looking through anything, Killian turned back to the letter to see what Emma had to say.  It was simple and to the point, just like her.

“ _Even if you weren’t here, it doesn’t mean that you should miss out on your son’s life.  My parents and I recorded all these and I had every intention to give them to you when I found you again.  I know I seemed like I never meant to tell you about him, but I did.  I had no way of contacting you because I didn’t think your number or emails would be the same…I figured you’d change them, so that’s on me._

_Anyways, I need to end this here because the Peanut and I are heading to yours for ice cream today._

_Love, Swan”_

 

Everything had been okay at the time (or least, it _seemed_ okay) …but by the end of that day, everything had gone to shit.

Killian shook himself out of his saddened stupor and turned back to the computer.  He clicked on the file and it opened to show six more folders; each labeled BIRTH, YEAR 1, YEAR 2, YEAR 3, YEAR 4, and YEAR 5.

He started with BIRTH.  The pictures started with Emma laying in a hospital bed, sweaty, and obviously in pain.  Several more showed David and Mary Margaret wiping the sweat from her brow or handing her ice chips, then they morphed to several of Emma sleeping peacefully, most likely after being given an epidural.

Killian laughed when the next several pictures looked like they were taken on accident because they were blurry shots of the hospital hallway or of David’s face.  Emma and Mary Margaret must’ve kicked him out of the hospital room when the time came.

However, David must have tried to take a video or something, because it caught the conversation inside Emma’s hospital room, while simply capturing the dark flannel of David’s shirt pocket:

 _“There’s another contraction coming, get ready to push.”_ (Probably Victor’s dad, Dr. Whale.)

_“No, no.  I can’t do this.”_

_“Emma, there’s no stopping this”_ , he heard her mother say.

 _“No.  I can’t do this without_ him _.  Please Mom, I need Killian.  I can’t have this baby without him.”_ Killian felt his heart break for the millionth time as tears, once again, welled up in his eyes.

_“I’m sorry baby, but Killian’s not here, remember?  He’s in California, away at school.”_

_“Right.  Yeah.”_  That must have been the moment Emma fainted because Mary Margaret started calling for David and Dr. Whale was shouting to get an OR ready.

Since Brady had been breach and was born via C-section, the next pictures (most likely taken by David) were through glass, of Mary Margaret holding Emma’s hand and stroking her hair as she lay still on the operating table as Dr. Whale and the nurses removed Brady.

David managed to take video of Brady being cleaned up and wrapped in a hospital blanket with a little blue knit cap (no doubt thanks to Granny).  Someone took a picture of David standing by the glass, pointing at his grandson with a huge smile on his face.

The next pictures were his favorite because they featured Emma holding a wrinkly, pink, and a (what appeared to be) screaming baby.  He saw tears in her eyes and a huge smile as she held their son.  These must have been taken after she woke up from the surgery.

Killian closed that folder and then moved on to the others, clicking through the biggest moments in his son’s life, grateful that he was able to see them.  He loved the (obvious) cellphone video of Brady sitting at the edge of the pier, his little chubby legs kicking back and forth over the water he was desperate to reach.

 _“You havin’ fun there Peanut?  My little Brady, hmm?”_ asked Emma from where she sat next to him, holding him so that he wouldn’t fall.

 _“Mmmm…ma.”_  Emma’s head whipped around to the camera.

 _“Elsa, please tell me you got that.  He said mama!”_  Elsa’s laughter rang out from behind the camera.

_“He’s just making sounds Emma.”_

_“Brady is 10 months old, he could totally be saying ‘mama’ already!”_

_“M…ma…”_

_“Elsa!”_

_“I’m recording, I’m recording.”_  His son looked up to his mother, holding his little arms up,

 _“Mama!”_  Killian had been getting steadily more emotional, and seeing Emma’s happiness almost drove him over the edge.

The video ended and there was another from a few days later.  By the looks of it, it was in Emma’s bedroom at her parent’s house.  She must have been intent on capturing anything because it looked like her phone was propped up against something to get her and Brady in frame a whole lot better.

It started with her leaning back after hitting play, holding Brady with her chest to his back and pointing to something sitting on the bed.

 _“Do you know who this is baby?”_  Brady took a photograph from Emma’s hand, immediately trying to shove it in his mouth.   _“No!  We don’t eat Gramma and Grandpa, Peanut!”_

_“G…g…gr…”_

_“Go on Brady, you can say it.  Gramma.”_

_“Gr…gra…grammy.”_  Emma whooped with excitement.

 _“Close enough!”_  She managed to get him to say ‘grandpa’ with more prompting before he saw her pull a small album from a shelf near her desk.

_“Mama!  Mama!”_

_“Yes?”_  Brady grabbed at the album in her hands.   _“This is special.  These are pictures of your papa and me.”_  Killian’s hand flew to his mouth as he watched Emma open the album, pointing to pictures of them and Brady would smack his little hand onto the picture and point.

_“Mama!  Mama! Mama!”_

_“That’s right and this is your papa.  Can you say that?  Papa?”_

_“Mama!”_

_“And Papa…”_  Emma pointed to a picture of them hugging a snowman they’d built, some snowy day the year before Brady was born.   _“Papa.”_

_“P…”_

_“That’s it…papa.  It’s your Papa.”_  She pointed to them again, herself and then him. _“Mama and Papa.”_  Killian’s tears were falling down his cheeks as he watched his son point to the picture.

_“P…p…pa.”_

_“You’ve almost got it Peanut.”_

_“Pa…p…a.  Pap…a.  Papa!”_

Killian hit pause, capturing Emma’s jubilance at Brady’s achievement, as he dropped his head into his hands and cried.  He cried for Emma, for his son, and all the firsts he’d missed with him.

He was so caught up in his emotion that it didn’t immediately register that his cellphone was ringing.  When he finally noticed, Killian picked up without checking who it was.

“’lo?”

 _“Oh my God Killian, are you okay?”_  His eyes widened as he took in the voice on the other end of the line: Emma.

“Aye, I’m…fine love.”

_“Killian…”_

“I’ve been going through the USB you gave me.”

 _“Oh.”_  From her lack of speech he knew she must be biting her lip, _“Why just now?  I reminded you a couple weeks ago.”_

“Forgive me.  I meant to, but Nemo had several of us working on a new ship design.  If mine gets chosen, I’ll get a bonus and a small residual each time the ship is produced.”

_“That’s amazing Killian!”_

“I have plans for that bonus.  With your permission, I was going to open a college fund for Brady with it.  He would be able to use it to go wherever he wanted, to be whatever he wanted.  The residual would go towards him too; we’d go on vacation to wherever he wanted, like Disneyland or Ireland or wherever.  All of it would be for him and I’d never miss anything big in his life ever again.”

_“You’d give all that up for him?”_

“I’d give my _life_ , Emma.  If something happened and I had to leave my job, the one thing I enjoy doing more than anything, I’d do it.  I’d leave it for him…and for you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Emma ran into Brady’s room, where he was playing with his Lego’s.

“Peanut?”

“Yes Momma?”

“Pack your overnight bag, you’re going to have a sleepover with Grandpa.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Mary Margaret and David didn’t have to ask what was going on when Emma arrived with Brady on their doorstep.

“You go get him sweetheart.  Let us know when you get there”, said Mary Margaret.  

“I will.”  Emma dropped down to her knees, eye level with her son.

“Where are you going Momma?”

“I’m going to go get your dad.”

“Really?!”

“You betcha!”  She ruffled his hair and kissed his cheeks.  “I’m going to bring him back and he’s going to stay with us forever, would you like that?”

“I’d love it Momma, please!”

“We’ll be back soon.”  Emma kissed him again and stood.  David picked his keys up from the entrance way table.

“Come on, I’ll take you to the bus station Princess.  There’s a bus leaving for Portland in 45 minutes, and we can get you on it if we hurry.”  Emma hugged her mother tight and then Brady once more before following her father out to his truck.

They made the bus station with 15 minutes to spare, and were able to buy tickets to another bus and then a train that would get her to Penn Station around nine the following morning.

“Thanks Daddy.”

“No problem, it’s what dads are for.”  He pulled her into a tight hug, cradling the back of her head like he always did.  “Good luck and be safe.”

“Thanks, and I will.”  Emma kissed his cheek and ran for the bus.  As the bus pulled out of town, her phone buzzed with a text from Liam:

 **_Liam:_ ** _Thought you might need this._

Below it was a text with the address for the hotel where Killian was living.  Emma smiled, knowing her mother must have been the one to let Liam know of her plan.

She looked out the window as the Maine scenery went by and smirked.

 

_It’s my turn to chase you now Killian…I just hope I haven’t ruined our chance._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I don't know how the process is supposed to go with babies and learning to talk. It probably doesn't happen as fast as it does here, but for the sake of the chapter, just go with it.
> 
> As always, don't forget to check out my Twitter for occasional updates: @blackwidownat4  
> or  
> My Tumblr: @blackwidownat2814


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma makes it to Manhattan.

[ **Emma & Killian** ](https://www.polyvore.com/chapter_13/set?id=217701703)

* * *

 

**Manhattan, the next day**

Killian watched as Brady stood on the beach, his little body being held up by David.  It was clear Mary Margaret was filming, since Emma was crouched down near the bottom of the frame.

 _“Come to Momma, Brady.”_ He laughed as Brady scrunched up his little face in concentration and took a step, wobbling back and forth then falling on his bottom.

 _“It’s okay little guy, Grampa’s got you.”_   David picked him up and held him under his arms.

 _“Momma!”_ Brady reached out for his mother and David let him go.  He wobbled again and fell on his behind once more.  It wasn’t Brady’s first time trying to walk, since he’d seen them trying on previous videos.  Killian could see the determination in his son’s face.

 _“You can do this Peanut.”_   Brady smiled at his mother’s encouragement and turned to his grandfather.

 _“Up!  Grampa up!”_   David stood him up once more and steadied him.  He let Brady stand on his own and Brady took a step…and didn’t fall.

Killian was sure his smile mirrored Emma’s when she turned to the camera.

_“Mom, did you get that?  My little boy took his first step on his own!”_

_“I got it, I got it!  But pay attention, he’s still going!”_   He watched as Emma turned back to their son, who was slowly making his way to her.

 _“That’s my little sailor!  Come on baby, you got this!”_   Brady wobbled at her with wide open arms, falling into her with his last step.  Emma stood with Brady and held him up above her as he giggled in excitement.

 _“Momma!  Fly!”_   Emma spun him around and he shrieked, clearly enjoying himself.  The video ended and Killian clicked on the next file: it was a picture of Emma and Brady, she was kissing his cheek and his little mouth was wide open as if he were laughing.  Killian quickly emailed himself the picture, setting it as his home screen background.

Even though he hadn’t been there for his boy’s first words or first steps, Killian felt like he had, all thanks to the videos Emma had given him.  After speaking to her on the phone the night before, he’d only looked at a few more files before finally collapsing into his bed.

It being the weekend, Killian woke up slightly later than usual the next morning.  After his breakfast had arrived, he’d set up his tablet to watch more videos while he ate.

Killian was enjoying a rather entertaining video of Emma trying to catch Brady as he ran in the snow when there was a frantic knocking at his door.

“Be right there!”  He paused what he’d been watching and wiped his mouth as he stood.  The knocking started again.  “I said I’ll be right there!”

She was the last person he expected to be there when he whipped open the door.

“Say something.”

“Emma?”  She nodded with a smile.

“Yeah.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to see you.”

“Is Brady okay?  Did something happen?”

“No, no.  Our son is fine.  In fact, he’s probably enjoying cinnamon pancakes with his grandparents right about now.”

“Why are you here to see me?” he asked.  “I thought--”

“Can you let me in first?  I took like, three buses and a train to get here and I’m _really_ tired and probably look scary as hell.”

“You look beautiful.”  Killian felt the heat rising in his cheeks all the way to the tips of his ears and he looked down at his feet.  “I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s okay”, Emma replied.  She walked in and took a seat at the table where he’d been eating his breakfast.

“It’s _not_ ”, Killian replied, as he took a seat across from her.

“Why would it not be?”

“I backed off remember?  We decided to be friends, for Brady’s sake”, he said with a sigh.

“Bad idea, that.”

“What?”

“I said it was a bad idea.”

“Being friends?”  Killian was very confused.  How could she not want to be friends with him?  He thought she no longer held anger towards him for anything.  “I thought you agreed with me.”

“You were wrong.  I don’t want to be friends with you.”

Killian felt the anger rising in his chest and he abruptly stood from his chair, almost knocking it over.

“You promised me Emma!  You promised me you wouldn’t do this!  How could you lie to me?”  He got even angrier when he turned to look at Emma and she was smiling.  “Why are you smiling?”

“Calm down and take a seat.”

“I don’t want--”

“Will you just shut up and do what I tell you?”

“ _Fine_.”  Killian plopped into the chair and crossed his arms like a petulant child.

“I don’t want to be friends because I want to be with you.  I love you, Killian.”

Killian almost fell out of his chair when she spoke.

“What?”

“I love you.  I want us to be a family…you, me, and Brady.”

“What?”  He didn’t think himself capable of saying anything else and watched as Emma practically jumped out of her chair.

“I was an idiot.  I was so absorbed in my own crap, worried that I’d get hurt, that I didn’t realize that I was the one who did the hurting.  I took away your opportunity to see your son grow up, to hear him speak his first words, to see him take his first steps…”

“Swan.”  Killian took her hand as he moved in front of her.  “I got to see it, you needn’t worry love.  Those videos you gave me?  I was so proud to see my boy have all his firsts…and he’s still young, with a lot of firsts left to go.”

Killian watched as she looked up at him, eyes brimming with tears.

“I’m just so sorry for everything.  I thought I was doing you a favor.  I wanted you to live a life that wasn’t hampered by something you didn’t ask for…and I know I was wrong now.  I just wanted you to have everything you wanted.”  Emma looked away.

Killian reached up and took her face in his hands, running his thumbs over the apples of her cheeks, leaning his forehead against hers as he smiled at her.

“Don’t you know Emma?  It’s you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

After everything that had happened, Emma never thought she’d have the opportunity to feel Killian’s lips on hers ever again.  This felt like their first kiss all over again, or more like another first kiss.  It was so perfect, so full of love, that if they had to break some sort of curse, this kiss would’ve done it.  Emma was sure it was on the list of amazing kisses, like Westley and Buttercup’s.

Too soon for her liking, breathing became a necessity, so she pulled away just enough to keep her forehead to his, keeping her eyes closed.

“Come home to us Killian.”

“I will, my love, but I cannot just yet.  I’ve a few days left before I can.”  Emma leaned back even more, and saw the worried look on Killian’s face.

“I understand.  Don’t worry, I do.”  She smiled and kissed him lightly.

“Really?”  Killian looked confused.

“Of course.  You need to see this through before you can come home for good.”

“My last day is Tuesday.  Nemo is taking the weekend to look at the designs for the new ship.”

“Can I see yours?”

“Of course darling.”  He kissed her forehead sweetly and stepped over to his laptop, turning it on and pulling up the file for his design.  Emma couldn’t help the smile that overcame her as Killian would talk about how everything would look and this and that and the excitement on his face at the prospect of his design being chosen.

She knew how much he wanted it for their son and she wished with all her heart that it happened for him.

“I’m so proud of you Killian.  Ever since you came back, I don’t think I’ve taken the time to see what it is that you do.  I can see how much you love it.”

“I do Swan, I do.  I love designing ships so much, but not even close to how much I love you and our son.”

“I know.”  Emma yawned wide.  “Oh geez, sorry about that.”

Killian took her right hand with his, and placed his left in her hair.

“Love, you must be dead on your feet.  You must want to get some sleep.”

“No, no…I’m fine.  I slept a little on the train.”

“Swan.”

“Killian.”

“Just change and get in the bed.  You need to rest.  Do that for me and we can go out for a late lunch later at my favorite place, hmm?”  Emma laughed when she saw the puppy dog eyes he was giving her.

“I hate when you do that.”

“Did it work?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh…shut it you.  You know it did.”  Emma made to walk away from him, but she felt his hand around her wrist as he pulled her back to him.  “What?”

“Nothing.  I just…I love you Emma.”

“I love you too.”  She stood up on her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him.  “Now, let me change so I can get a nap.”

“Okay.”  Killian kissed her lightly and she took her duffel with her to the bathroom where she changed quickly before washing her face and running a brush through her hair.  Before leaving the bathroom, she sent a quick text to her parents, letting her know everything was okay.

**_Mom:_ ** _I’m glad you made it okay sweetheart.  How is everything with Killian?_

**Emma:** Fine, actually.

**_Mom:_ ** _Oh?_

**Emma:**   He told me he loves me.

**_Mom:_ ** _!!!!!_

**Emma:** I’ll tell you everything later, I promise.  I’m going to get some sleep now.  Tell Brady his momma and papa love him.

**_Mom:_ ** _I will...he says he loves you too.  Have fun Emma ;-)_

**Emma:** Mom!

~*~*~*~*~*~

Killian sat at the foot of the bed, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, waiting for Emma to finish changing.  He was a little worried because she’d been in there for a while.  Despite that, he couldn’t believe his luck: he had the love of his life back…Emma had come back to him.

Before his thoughts could get derailed, the bathroom door opened and Emma was silhouetted in the door frame with the light behind her: she wore a long-sleeve shirt that was slipping off one of her shoulders and light purple lounge pants that with TIE Fighters and the Star Wars logo all over them.  Her hair hung loose around her shoulders and she was fidgeting nervously, picking at the hem of her shirt.

“Are you okay love?” he asked her.  Emma stepped into the room, shutting off the bathroom light and Killian stood to meet her.

“Y-yeah.  It’s just…”  Emma looked down at her feet, so he took her chin in hand and brought her face back to his.

“What is it Swan?”

“Nothing bad.  I was just letting my mom know everything was okay, that I’d arrived and all that and--Brady says hello and he loves you by the way--and I just happened to realize how happy I am.  I haven’t been this happy since Brady was born.  This is real, right Killian?  I’m not dreaming?  I haven’t fallen asleep somewhere between the first and third bus or something?”

“No, my love, this is real.  I promise to prove it to you, but I think it’s time you rest.”  He kissed her and then swept her up in his arms.

“Killian!” Emma cried and kicked her legs.  “What are you doing?”

“Taking you to bed, putting you to rest.”  He lay her down on the side opposite the one he usually occupied and pulled the covers up before jogging around to the other side and getting in next to her…then it hit him and he moved to get back out of the bed.

“Killian?  What’s wrong?” she asked as she reached over to stop him.  He looked away.

“I’m sorry Swan.  I didn’t even think to ask if this was okay.  I know _we’re_ okay, but it doesn’t mean that we can just jump into _this_.  I know we’re not actually going to be doing anything, but still…”

“Killian, look at me.”  He looked over at her, “It’s okay.  Like you said, we’re not doing anything, we’re just going to rest.”

“If you’re sure love.”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything.”


	14. Happy Birthday Brady Jones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told myself I wasn't going to give excuses to y'all as to why this chappie was so late, but I have to. I was having a hard time continuing this chapter (I blame some icky writer's block) and with the news of Jen's departure from the show, I think it made me sad enough that I just didn't feel like working on it. I really am sorry everyone...I didn't mean to let it go this long before posting. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy the final chapter!  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> (Also, I was raised in a Roman Catholic household so my characters happen to believe in God. I hope this story choice doesn't offend any of my non-believing readers, as it was not my intention. I was writing and I thought it would make for a fluffy bit of story. It should be the only time it's really mentioned at that level.)

**_Emma & Brady’s, October 30th_ **

Emma hated lying to her son, but she had her reasons.  She and Killian had returned from Manhattan a few days before and decided to surprise Brady on his birthday.  The plan was for Killian to come over early the next morning where he’d get into a big refrigerator box filled with packing peanuts and then Emma would close it up and present it to Brady when he woke up.

As if he knew he was on his mother’s mind, Brady came barreling down the hall and jumped up into Emma’s bed.

“Brady Flynn!  What have I told you?”

“Sorry Momma.”  Emma pulled him to her side and gave him a big hug.

“What’s on your mind Peanut?”

“Papa.”  Emma frowned because she knew how sad he was that his Papa couldn’t be there for his birthday…when in reality, he’d come home with Emma and had just spent his time cooped up with his brother so Brady’s birthday surprise wouldn’t be spoiled.

~*~*~*~*~*~

_(Killian said he didn’t mind waiting, but she knew it was driving him nuts since he was also waiting for his boss to choose the ship design.  Liam had told her that he’d begun to wear a track into the wood floor in the living room from all of the pacing around.)_

_They’d gotten to see each other once since their return from Manhattan.  They’d planned to have a picnic at the docks, but the temperature decided to drop way too low and instead opted for a romantic inside picnic at Emma’s shop, while Brady spent the night with his grandparents.  They ate dinner and after, Killian gifted her with silver necklace that had a simple silver ship’s wheel and swan on it._

_“So you remember that I’ll always,_ always _be by your sid_ _e.”_

~*~*~*~*~*~

“What about Papa?”

“I miss him.”  The look on her son’s face just about broke Emma’s heart and she almost ruined the surprise.

“I know Peanut.  I do too.  But I don’t want you to worry because I promise you that we’ll see him soon.”  Brady’s face lit up like the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree and he started bouncing in his spot.

“Really Momma?!”

“Yup!”

“Pinky swear?”  Brady curled his little hand into a fist and stuck out his pinky at her.

“Pinky swear”, Emma answered as she curled her finger around his and they touched thumbs to ‘lock’ in the promise.  Brady gave her a kiss on the cheek and made to scoot off the bed and go back to his room, but Emma stopped him.  “Peanut?”

“Yes Momma?”

“How about you go and get the Captain and sleep in here with me?  For old time’s sake?”

“Yay!”  He jumped off the bed and his little feet pitter-pattered down the hall to his room and returned with the Captain Hook doll Killian had given him.

“Did you brush your teeth?”

“Yes Momma.”

“Hands?”

“Uh huh.”

“Last potty break?”

“Yup!”

“How about prayers?”  Brady reached up to scratch behind his ear in a move that was just _so_ Killian, that Emma almost cried.

“Uh-uh.”

“Come on, let’s you and me take care of that.”  Brady sat in her lap and closed his little eyes.

“Dear God…please watch over my Papa and Momma and Grammy and Gramps and Uncle Liam.  Tomorrow’s my birfday so could you please make sure my Papa makes it?  I really, really, _really_ , love him and I miss him.  So…can you send him to me please?  Ame-oh!  Could you say hi to my grandma and grandpa too please?  And tell them Papa and Uncle Liam miss them? Tell them _Is breá liom thú_ from me...they'll know what it means.  Thank you!  Amen.”

Emma had been holding in her tears since he started his prayers, so she kissed his forehead and tucked him into the spot next to her.  She let him know she was going to get a quick glass of water and jogged out to the kitchen, where she collapsed against the island and cried as quietly as she could.  Emma couldn’t be more thankful for the amazing little boy she and Killian had made.

She finally calmed herself and wiped her eyes when she heard him calling for her.  Emma went back to her bedroom and got in bed where her son was curled up clutching his Captain Hook.  Brady scooted into her arms, tucking his little head under chin and she placed a kiss at his temple.  It was only a few minutes later when his breathing evened out and he was out like a light.

Emma reached over to her nightstand and grabbed her phone.  She opened the camera and took a picture of them and then texted it to Killian.

 

**_The Captain:_ ** _I’m jealous darling._

**My Swan Princess:** You’re jealous of your own son?

**_The Captain:_ ** _Of course not my love._

**_The Captain:_ ** _I’m jealous that I am not there with either of you._

**My Swan Princess:** I’m sorry Killian.

**_The Captain:_ ** _That is the past Emma.  Now we look to the future and I know one day we will have that future where you and Brady and I will be together, always._

**My Swan Princess:** I love you Killian.

**_The Captain_ : ** _I love you too my Swan._

**_The Captain:_ ** _Now go to sleep because I plan on seeing you early tomorrow morning to surprise our boy._

 

Emma smiled and put her phone down, wrapping her arm around Brady and allowing sleep to take her.

~*~*~*~*~*~

**Halloween, Brady’s 5 th Birthday**

Emma woke up the next morning to her alarm and quickly silenced it.  Luckily for her, Brady had migrated towards the right side of the bed, and so she slipped out as quietly as she could.  She tip-toed slowly to her bedroom door and stopped suddenly when she heard Brady moving.  When it was obvious he wasn’t waking up, Emma left her bedroom and quietly shut the door.

She pulled on a hoodie and hurried downstairs to the shop to make some of her special hot chocolate while she waited for Killian.  As Emma was sprinkling the cinnamon over top the whipped cream, there was a knock at the back door in the kitchen.

“Who is it?”

“It is your dashing rapscallion pirate, my darling.”  Emma rolled her eyes.

“You nerd…it’s unlocked, come in”, she called and went back to her masterpieces.  Emma jumped a little but immediately relaxed when she felt a pair of strong arms circle around her waist.

“I take a certain amount of offense to being called a nerd, love.  I am dashing and a scoundrel and--”  Emma twisted around in his arms, wrapping hers around his neck.

“Killian Jones, you are and will always be, a humongous nerd.”  She went for a quick peck on his lips and then slipped away to get a couple pastries to add to their breakfast.

“Swaaan…”

“Don’t worry, it’s number three on my list of top three things that I love most about you”, Emma said as she handed him his hot chocolate.

“Oh really?  What’s the second then?” he asked as he took a sip.

“How much you love our son.”  Emma laughed quietly as she saw the tips of his pointed ears that stuck out from under his beanie turn red.  “And the top thing I love the most?  Those ears of yours, of course.” 

Killian put his hot chocolate down and pulled his beanie to cover his ears as best he could.

“ _Swaaan_ …”  Emma rolled her eyes as she laughed lightly.

“Just finish your stuff, okay?  You’ve got a son to surprise.”  Emma drained her cup and took it to the sink in the kitchen as Killian followed after her.  When he was done, she cleaned up their mess and they made their way upstairs quietly.

Killian brought out the empty refrigerator box out from the spare room and set it up in the living room.

“I can’t wait to see his little face”, said Killian.

“He prayed for you to be able to come to his party”, replied Emma and she started to dump some packing peanuts in the box.

“Did he really?”

“Yeah.  He asked for it.  That wasn’t it though, and this is what just got me so bad that I had to go sit in the kitchen and cry.”

“What happened love?” asked Killian as he brushed a lock of Emma’s hair behind her ear.

“He asked God to tell his grandparents _Is breá liom thú_.”  Emma watched as Killian understood which grandparents Brady had been referring to.

“Did he really?” he asked with eyes brimming with tears.

“Yup.”

“We have a perfect little boy, don’t we Swan?”

“We do.”  Emma pulled Killian in for a quick kiss.  He frowned playfully when she pulled away.  “However, we’re going to spoil his perfect surprise if you don’t get in the box.”

Killian stepped in, rolling his eyes the entire time.

“I do not see why we need the peanuts.”

“Authenticity.  Now just shush and get comfy.”  Just as Emma was closing up the last flap of the box, the door to her bedroom opened and Brady ran into the living room.

“Momma!  Momma!”

“Yes Peanut?” Emma replied, feigning innocence.

“It’s my birfday!”

“Is it?”

“ _Momma!_ ” When Brady whined, he sounded just like his father…and she knew Killian had realized this because she could feel the box shake slightly.  Emma gave the box a small kick and scooped up her son.

“Happy Birthday!  How old are we today?”  Brady stuck out one little fist, holding up five fingers, while the other hand still held fast to his Captain Hook doll his father had given him.

“I’m five!”

“You’re five?!”

“Yes Momma!”

“Well, since you’re five”, Emma said as she put him down, “That means you get a special present!”

“I do?!”

“Yes sir.  This here is from your Papa, because he’s sorry that he hasn’t been here because of work.”

“It’s so big!”

“Isn’t it?  Maybe you should tip it over so that it will be easier for you to open.”  Emma barely heard the scoff from inside the box before their son started pushing, trying to get the box to fall over.

“Momma, it’s so heavy!”

“I bet it is.  Too many sweets can do that to you.”

Killian must’ve had enough and popped up and out of the box, with a slightly indignant,

“ _Hey!_ ”

“Papa!  You’re here!”  Emma smiled wide as Killian stepped out of the box and quickly scooped Brady up in his arms.

“Of course I am my boy!  I would never miss your birthday, I love you too much!”  Brady’s little arms encircled his father’s neck as he squeezed him in a tight hug.

“Can we have birthday pancakes now Momma?  Since Papa’s here?” he asked.

“Of course Peanut”, she replied.  “How about you get your Papa to help you get dressed while I make the pancakes?”

Brady frowned.  He wiggled in Killian’s arms until his father put him down, and he crossed his arms.

“I’m **five** Momma”, he said as he held up his little hand again, “I don’t need help.”  Brady turned and went back to his bedroom, dragging Hook behind him.

“Stubborn, just like his mother”, Killian said, wrapping his arms around Emma’s middle and propping his chin on her shoulder.

“Excuse me?  That is all you buddy.”

“Swan…please.  You _can_ be a bit of a stubborn lass.  But don’t worry, I still love you.”

“Whatever.”  Emma turned her head and gave him a quick kiss.  “Go make sure our son doesn’t wear his underwear on the outside or something.  I know he’s five now, but still.  I’ll get started on breakfast.  My parents will be joining us for birthday pancakes too, so feel free to invite Liam over.”

“Of course love, he’ll be happy to partake in the celebration.”

Emma smiled as she watched Killian make his way down the hall to Brady’s room.  She relished in the immense happiness she felt as she got the ingredients for birthday pancakes ready. 

For the first time since realizing she’d have to tell Killian about Brady, felt at ease about everything.  Life was certainly looking perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's only one more left (the epilogue) and then we're done. Thank you for coming on this journey of my third multi-chapter Captain Swan fic. I know that first one I wrote wasn't the greatest, but it was my first try so...yeah. Let me know what you think and expect the Epilogue sometime this month.


	15. Epilogue- Never Forget, Swan...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Killian birthday again, and he's about to get the greatest present...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank all of you who have stayed with me throughout this journey. I know this last chapter has been a long time coming. I meant for it to go up yesterday, in honor of Colin's birthday, but between work and taking care of parents who've BOTH managed to catch something, I was beat.
> 
> This chapter is the only one that won't be beta'd by my bestie best Courtney, as I wanted to get it out to you guys as soon as I could (sorry Dude!), so please forgive any mistakes or whatnot.
> 
> With all that being said, read on and let me know what you think!

**_One year, two months, and 27 days later…_ **

Emma smiled as she watched Killian chatting with her father across the room they were in at The Rabbit Hole.  It was January 26th and it was Killian’s birthday and she couldn’t wait to give him his gift.

The gift had been discovered after a visit to Victor’s office earlier in the week and was most likely a result of her and Killian’s honeymoon in the Caribbean almost four months before.  With their son’s help, he’d proposed the previous summer while on a sail in Storybrooke Bay and they’d gotten married in late September of the same year.  Brady had pouted and shed a few tears when he realized he couldn’t join his parents on their trip, but quieted down when Killian promised they’d take a family vacation to Disney World at some point in the next year…

~*~*~*~*~*~

_“Can we see Captain Hook, Papa?”_

_“Of course lad!  We’ll even see Mr. Smee and Tinkerbelle and Peter and the Lost Boys and everyone you want”, Killian replied._

_“CAN WE EVEN MEET DARTH VADER?!”  Emma huffed a laugh.  Ever since he’d seen_ A New Hope _with his Uncle Liam at the local theater, he had become obsessed with everything_ Star Wars _._

_“Yeah Peanut, even the Dark Lord of the Sith.”_

~*~*~*~*~*~

Speaking of her son, Emma smiled some more as he sat on a bar stool next to his papa, swinging his little six year old legs back and forth.  She knew Brady would be excited about their expanding family, but she was still a little nervous about telling him.  He’d be finding out soon enough.

Emma was interrupted when her mother took a seat next to her.

“How’s the grape juice?” she asked and Emma almost did a spit take.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Grape juice.”

“How do you know that?”

“I went to grab the bottle of wine to top off my glass and took a sip.  Liam caught me and said that that bottle was specifically for you.  You told your brother-in-law before telling your husband?”

“First of all mom, you can’t keep a secret to save your life, so don’t even.”  Emma took a drink of her juice and put her glass down.  “Secondly, I had to because I needed Liam to keep this bottle for me behind the bar.  He can keep secrets, unlike some people.”

“I’m not _that_ bad!” exclaimed Mary Margaret.  Emma simply raised an eyebrow at her.  “Okay fine, I am.  But forget about all that!  When are you telling him?”

“Very soon.”  Emma pointed to a small gift box sitting on the table.  “The sonogram is in here.”

“Can I see?” her mother asked and Emma nodded.  Mary Margaret opened the box and stared at the picture.  After a few seconds, her eyes began to water.

“Mom, you okay?”

“Of course!  It’s just…you saw this right?”

“Yeah.  Victor told me all about it.  I hope Killian doesn’t mind too much.”  Neither one of the women had noticed the birthday boy shuffle up to their table.

“You hope Killian doesn’t mind what?” he asked.  Emma quickly shut the box and Mary Margaret wiped her eyes.

“Nothing!  It’s a surprise!” said Emma.

“Okay”, Killian replied like he didn’t believe her.  “Are you okay Mary Margaret?”

“Yes!  Perfectly fine!  Nothing’s wrong!”  Her voice sounded like it went up almost two whole octaves.  “I’ll just go now because it’s almost time for presents!”

Mary Margaret practically ran off toward the table where the mic and David were and Killian turned back to his wife with a perplexed look on his face.

“I’m missing something”, he said, taking a seat and kissing Emma’s temple.

“Don’t worry, it’ll all be revealed soon.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

The mic crackled to life as David tapped on it.

“Attention!  I just want to thank all of you for being here for my favorite son-in-law’s birthday--”

“I’m your only son-in-law!” Killian called from the back of the room.

“--, but it’s time to sing and blow out some candles--”

“And presents Grandpa!” called Brady.”

“--and yes, presents.  So get up here Killian!”  David motioned for him to move.

Killian stood and pulled Emma with him, Brady joining them up at the front.  Liam brought the cake out from the kitchen, courtesy of Ingrid’s bakery:  a Jammie Dodger flavored pirate ship.  Numbered candles in the shape of ‘25’ sat in the blue icing ocean and a fondant figurine of Captain Hook (aka Killian) standing at the helm. 

Liam lit the candles and the whole bar started singing ‘Happy Birthday’, the loudest being Brady, who was singing so loud that it was basically screaming.  He clapped the loudest when his papa blew out the candles.

“Did you make a wish Papa?” he asked.

“Didn’t need to my boy”, replied Killian, picking Brady up and sitting him on his hip.

“Why not?  Everyone needs to make a wish!”

“Not when you have everything you need.”  The sound of retching came from Liam’s direction as he rolled his eyes and laughed good naturedly in his brother’s direction.

“You cheesy fu--”

“ _Liam_!”  Killian gave his brother a smiling glare.

“Sorry.”

Emma laughed and Killian put Brady back on the ground as Ingrid came over to assume cake-cutting duties.  David handed the mic to Liam to take over MC-ing duties.

“While the cake is being dealt with, it’s time for presents!  I believe the honor of the first gift goes to my little brother--”

“ _Younger_!”

“-- 's wife.  Emma?”

All of a sudden, Emma felt like her cheeks were on fire and she was sweating bullets.  What if he wasn’t happy about their newest blessing?  They were both still young and--Emma stopped her train of thought.  This was _Killian_ and if he had forgiven her after keeping the existence of their son a secret for five years, and been so over the moon when he’d met his son, then this would just be another happy moment her father always said that life was made up of.

Emma put a big smile on her face and handed over the small green gift box.

“Happy Birthday Killian Jones.”

“Thank you Emma Jones.”

“Oh my God…just open it, _leathchean_ _n_!” said Liam from a few feet away.

Killian was still laughing as he looked down and pulled the cover off…and his laughter died immediately.

“Happy Birthday?”  Emma watched as he pulled the sonogram from the box.  No one in the room was really speaking, only faint murmurs rippling through the crowd as they wondered what the gift was.  “Killian?”

“What is it Papa?  What’s that gray blob?” asked Brady.  Killian finally broke out of his trance as he turned to look at Emma, eyes wet with tears.  He knelt down next to his son and showed him the picture.

“You see this blob, my son?”

“Uh huh.”

“This blob is your baby brother or sister.”

“Mama’s having a baby?”  The murmuring in the crowd got a little louder.

“Yes she is.”  Killian stood and took a step towards Emma, but she stopped him before he could wrap her in a hug.  “What is it Swan?”

“Look at the picture again.”

“Wh--”

“Just look.”  Killian turned and took the sonogram from Brady and scrutinized it.

“I don’t understand what am I missing?”  Emma pointed to the blob on the right.

“This is a baby…and this--”, she said, pointing to the blob on the left, “--is also a baby.”

“I know _that_.  Victor made a mirror image or something…”

“No I didn’t!” the doctor called from somewhere near the bar and people started laughing and there were a few gasps for those who were starting to realize what Emma was saying…unlike her husband.  She figured he was just overwhelmed that it wasn’t clicking in his brain.

“ _Tá sí ag iompar clainne le cúpla, tá tú amadán!_ ”  Killian’s head whipped around to Liam and then back to Emma.

“Twins?  You’re…twins?”

“Yeah.”  Killian finally pulled her into a tight hug and the bar erupted in cheers and applause.  The happy couple looked down when they felt little arms wrap around their waists.

“I’m gonna have TWO baby brothers or sisters?!” cried Brady.  Emma crouched down to be at his level.

“Yeah Peanut, but I want you to know that we won’t love you any less and being a big brother is a very important job.  Since there’s going to be two, we’re going to need all the help we can get.  Are you going to be ready?”

“Uh huh!”  Brady stepped back and put his hands on his hips, puffing his small chest out with pride.  Killian kissed his wife and ran to jump on a table,

“I MADE TWINS!”

Everyone began to cheer and laugh once more.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that night, as they lay in bed with their son between them, Killian reached over to lay his hand on Emma’s very slightly showing belly (it _was_ twins after all).

“I’m so happy that you’re happy about this”, Emma said, covering his hand with her own. 

“Why wouldn’t I be my love?”

“Twins is a lot Killian…and we’re still young.  I didn’t want you to think--”

“Would you do me a favor?” he asked, cutting her off.  Emma nodded.  “Relax.  You could’ve said you had a whole brood in there and I’d never get to see me mates at the pub ever again and I wouldn’t have cared.”

“Really?”

“Of course darling.  You and Brady and these two right here are my life.  Besides…”  Kilian leaned over and kissed her lightly, “Never forget, Swan, how much I love you.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Five months later, Daisy Alice and Benjamin Liam Jones were born.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> leathcheann- idiot  
> “Tá sí ag iompar clainne le cúpla, tá tú amadán!”- "She's pregnant with twins, you fool!"  
> .  
> .  
> All translations are courtesy of Google Translate, so please forgive me if they're somewhat off.  
> ...also, sorry that I didn't get y'all one last Polyvore collection!


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